ZypherQueen 
Vinsane #1
Posts: 120
(6/29/03 7:38 pm)
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 #3 The Unforgiven
I have a list of people who have in someone hurt me, betrayed me or have turned on me. These are the Unforgiven, the people who know matter how hard you try, you just can't forget all they have done.
Forgiving their past discretions is like drinking sewer water...it makes me ill even thinking about how they walk the earth right now, free of worries and smiling as if they are fit to live.
Once I had been taught to forgive and forget, but in the late summer of 1993 a real close friend had done the unthinkable...she slept with my boyfriend while I was away visitng my family in Texas.
I knew before I left something was up, and I knew it involved her, but I would have never imagine it would be with the man I loved. Oh it hurt like hell to know that I was not enough for him.
First, came the ignoring of my phone calls, then the silence when I did reach him and finally she answered his cellphone late one morning...I called on a fluke to see if he would answer and she did instead.
Many things I can forgive and forget, but to hear her voice on the other end of his cellphone enraged me so. I didn't say a word...didn't utter a sound. I listened to her repeatily say hello over and over until she finally hung up.
I called back making sure the number was blocked and again she answered, it was then I knew she was with him and had probably been with him before I left...she was to comfortable.
As if God spoke to her, she listened, paused in mid sentenced and handed him the phone. "Hello," his voice was scruffy and laced with exhaustion.
Rage filled my veins and instense thoughts of hatred swirled around my head as I found the strength to remain silent. I hung up as tears clouded my eyes.
"Damn him!" I was pissed and hurt all at the same time and in dire need of a release...I grabbed paper and pen and began to feverously write until every single page was stained with my tears and the WORD unforgiven scribbled in bold on every page.
There would be no going back, no kissing and making up, no friend to think about...my heart ached and I didn't care if I ever saw either of them again.
Edited by: ZypherQueen at: 6/29/03 11:29 pm
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