Auron BlackPlayer's Name: Allan E-Mail: straken1@hotmail.com Other means of Contact: MSN, AIM, available upon request.
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Name: Auron Black.
Nickname: N/A.
Code Name: Black Thunder.
Affiliation: Unallied.
Gender: Male. Age: 18 Birthday: August 17th Hair: Blonde Eyes: Green Mother: Sylvia Black (Original) Father: John Harold Black (Original) Sister: Gracie Black (Original, deceased)
Physical Description: A rather tall individual, with the ceiling-scraping height of 6'1". Well, not so much ceiling-scraping, but he looked rather tall. He was lean and in decent shape, though nothing overly impressive. He could usually be found in plain, darker clothing, preferably black jeans and simple t-shirts. Depending on his mood, he might dress up. His face wasn't some super-handsome model, though it was nice on the eyes. Just enough to catch a glance. His hair also helped out, being short and curly, having the 'cute guy' look down. And, mixed with those odd green eyes (sparking with random colors around the iris), he had a relatively decent look about himself.
With a soft-spoken voice, though relatively deep, one wouldn't suspect anything really violent from Auron. He almost looked and sounded like the sort of person who could be found in a library. Head held a bit low, hands tucked into pockets, and slow, cautious steps. Some might go so far as to say he looked like he lacked a 'spine' (in the emotional sense).
Powers:
Auron's got a rather potent ability, but extremely limited control and knowledge. First, I'm going to list his powers and their full capacity, along with the complicated manner by which they work, and then I'm going to say which powers he has.
Auron's powers are: Electricity Manipulation/Absorption (including electromagnetic solar waves [light rays]), Flight (accessed by the manipulation of the electric waves around his body), the ability to have extremely extended endurance by drawing on his stored electricity, and light control over electromagnetic waves, giving him moderate control over magnetism. However, he'd never be as powerful as Magneto in this respect.
His powers can be described on a cellular level. Plant cells absorb light and transfer it to energy by use of the chloroplast and Mitochondrion. Every cell in Auron's body runs on a similar principal, taking in sun light and transferring it from light to Energy to ATP, then directly to Electrical charges. They are stored in all the various cells of his body. However, these cells can also take in and store raw electricity. There is an upper-limit as to just how much electricity/energy he can absorb before his cells will begin to 'burst', causing extreme amounts of pain and deterioration of his body. And, if he holds a charge of too great a magnitude for too long a time, he could die. Also, if he's over charged quickly (think grabbing onto a hydro-dam), there's a chance the resulting electro-cellular imbalance may effect the atomic structure and cause a rather impressive explosion, which would most likely obliterate Auron.
Furthermore, his body cells can also turn the electricity to ATP molecules (a form of energy the body uses), along with a few other forms of energy, going through his body and supplying the same energy to his blood that Oxygen does, only on a near-instant level, giving him an extreme level of endurance. Marathon runner, anyone? And, in theory, he could survive without air. Mind you, this may never be tested, since Auron and Water go badly together.
He can also release this stored electricity through any part of his body, though he prefers his hands/arms. Also, he can control the electricity that he sends out, similar to Pyro's control over fire. This form of control is manipulated by advanced chemical processes in his brain, which send out electrical pulses to control electricity as he 'imagines' it. The distance as to which he can manipulate Electricity up to is about 5 meters, further distance would require a lot of focus. Also, he can create a sort of 'force field' (referred to as an e-field) in mid-air, so long as it's connected to his body, and fill it with electricity, giving him the ability to create Weapons and, in extreme cases, shielding, out of electricity. Though the amount of energy required to sustain a field increases exponentially in comparison to the size of the field. Therefore, a sword would take far less energy to create than a full-body shield.
Also, by manipulating the electromagnetic waves and the EM field, he can use Magnetism, though, at best, he'd be able to lift up a car. And that would be with some extreme training, and mastery over the vast majority of his other powers.
Now, for weaknesses. If strong magnetic waves are directly focused upon Auron, he can be subdued rather easily. They cause an imbalance in his absorption powers and cause the pathways in his brain to short circuit, similar to crossing a fork over a circuit board. This can easily lead to a coma. Also, contact with Water tends to forcibly cause his electricity to do an electrolysis process on the water, and can very quickly drain him of the electricity in his body, leaving him very weak. He can usually withstand rain however, and if he concentrates well enough, he can take showers safely. His mouth, however, is an exception to this rule, as he needs to be able to drink. His mouth has a constant e-field inside of itself, along with his throat, esophagus, stomach, digestive track... All that internal stuff.
As for controlled powers... Auron can manipulate electricity at this point. That's about it. He has vast power at his fingertips, but without guidance, he won't be able to do very much. He doesn't know of his extreme endurance, though it's constantly there. He hasn't really been in much of a situation where he had to worry about it. Sure, he could probably send out a bolt or two of lightening, but unless he simply lost control over his emotions and went crazy, his powers won't be making too many people cry. Unless, of course, you count all those static zaps he gives people.
History: Auron grew up in a non-mutant family. Actually, they were mutant-fearing. The traditional God-loving, mutant-hating all-American family.
Auron's parents were actually having a lot of trouble conceiving a child, and decided to go see a doctor about it. Of course, it turned out that Auron's father had a very low sperm count, and his mother had scar tissue inside of her fallopian tubes, which created a bit of trouble in the process.
Though, thanks to modern medicine, they were capable of conceiving a child. Go medicine.
Regardless, Auron grew up as any child did. Bumbling, stumbling, laughing, and watching re-runs of Power Rangers. Standard stuff. His Father wanted him to be a football star, and his Mother wanted a Rocket Scientist. Big hopes for their only child.
Of course, Auron turned out to be the soft-spoken calm-type kid, the sort who was picked on and bullied a lot in high school. He also had a bonsai plant that he kept care of. He loved trimming it.
As far as relations in school went, Auron was a regular guy. He had one steady Girl Friend for a year or two, though they eventually broke up on mutual terms. It was between the ages of 14 and 16. And, he always had a small group of about four close friends, who shared similar interests and were just as quiet as he was.
His powers revealing themselves was not much of a shocker for everyone. Mostly because it wasn't in front of anyone. Auron noticed, after a few weeks, that his MP3 player's batteries died way too fast, and that the toaster took longer to cook toast than normal. And the reception on his TV was really, really bad! Not to mention that the remote died like, every five days.
So, one day, while trimming his bonsai, a charge of electricity passed from him to one branch. And poof. There goes half the tree. At first, he just thought it was a crazy release of static energy. However, when he went to try and repair the damage, the other half of the Bonsai was destroyed.
And, for the next fifteen minutes or so, he'd burn, break, and melt item after item in his room. In fact, when his parents came to investigate the smell, they thought he was a major pyromaniac and took his lighter. Yeah, there go his incense privileges.
So, after a few melted Lawn Gnomes and blackened picket fences, a young Auron learned how to control the most basic of his abilities. However, he only did this to help prevent the random outbursts of power that would release from his body. Though, like any Mutant with a high level of power, it would only be a matter of time before Auron's powers got out of control.
Oh, did I forget to mention that his parents happened to conceive another child? Yeah, that's kind of important. Else they might've spent more attention on their budding mutant son. Heck, they might've even seen his powers coming! See, despite the complications around conception, it was still possible for his parents to conceive. And, after ten years of marriage with one kid, well, the rest shouldn't have to be said. Mind you, she was ten years younger than Auron.
Auron loved his little sister. There's nothing else more that can be said. They had a strong relationship, with him usually referring to her as 'squirt', to which she'd simply laugh and tug on his pant-leg, wanting to be hoisted up onto one of his shoulders. More than anything, his little sister wanted to be tall. Auron was always more than happy to spend time with her, since he viewed her life as a miracle.
So then the boy graduated, which made his parents all the more happy. He was having a grand time at his house, joking about what University he'd be going to, or what courses he'd study, when a slight thunder storm managed to knock out the power. So, his father, eight-year-old sister and his mother decided to go poke at the generator.
Bad idea.
One more bolt of Lightening would prove to have disastrous consequences. It struck Auron while he was outside (his body being a natural conductor of electricity, like a lightening rod), and a rather large discharge of his own electrical powers soon was released.
Sure, his parents were fine, but his little sister died. And his Parents couldn't forgive their 'genetically born' son for killing their 'real' offspring. Fortunately for him, he already had an apartment lined up. Though, he didn't think he'd be moving so soon.
And now, with a slightly broken will and a very heavy heart, Auron moved.
Personality: Auron's a calm, collected, and quiet individual. Though he does have a certain degree to which he can be pushed before he 'snaps', he hasn't actually ever experienced it before. He's a great and loyal friend, though his trust is hard to gain. Most of the time, he can be found with a smile, though now it's a rather regretful one. He can't really get past the death of his sister.
Aside from that, he can usually be found reading a book or doing something productive like that. The general quiet guy.
Likes:
Loves working on Banzai, Vanilla flavored treats, and kittens.
Dislikes:
Dogs. He was bitten when he was younger, and hasn't gotten over it. He also dislikes his lack of control over his powers, and his memories. He just wants them to go away.
Sample Post:
The Alarm's pathetic 'roar' broke the tranquility of the morning, though it didn't really matter. Sure, it might scare some people, or annoy others, but Auron was awake anyway. He couldn't sleep much anymore. His dreams were a haunting memory to himself. He moved his hand over the alarm clock, though he didn't push any buttons. The alarm slowed down, almost sounding defeated as it groaned and stopped. Auron's eyes opened slowly, staring at his ceiling for a few moments.
He sighed softly, bringing his feet to rest on the cold linoleum floor, his head pointing down and looking toward them. He wasn't really sure of how much time passed as he looked down. All he knew was the bitter memories that clung to the edge of his mind.
The Cereal made a rather hollow clinking sound as it bounced down into the bowl. He filled the bowl up half-way, before realizing that the Box was empty. Though, it took him some time before this realization sunk in. His mind was elsewhere.
He sighed as he closed the door of his fridge, having completely forgotten to get milk. With a groan, he sat down in front of the bowl and began to eat the cereal dry.
He opened the door slowly, adjusting the shirt he had put on, before stepping out and locking it behind himself. He shook his head and took a few steps out, putting the keys in his pockets, then walking down the busy streets. A smile was placed on his face as he stopped outside a small bakery, holding a resume in hand.
The door was swung open, followed by soft and happy words from him, though they were mostly forced out. Only a close friend, or a skilled individual, could tell such a thing, though. Seemed that this guy was in need of a job.
Edited by: Zerodus at: 7/22/06 3:09 am
Seems like I'm the first to comment so without any further ado, here we go:
General: It's true that we always say "Write in past tense, damn you!!" but that usually doesn't apply to descriptive passages (i.e. everything but sample and history). You don't necessarily have to change that, just a hint for future applications. ... funny though, you only did that in the appearance bit
Appearance: Could you please add something about his way of moving and his voice please?
Powers: Wow, that's a lot. I know you did it shortly already but what I'd suggest in order to give people easier access to what he is actually able to do at this point would be that you maybe bold the parts in question.
Seeing as he isn't really able to do much more than direct electricity around and shoot some sparks (or so it sounds... maybe add some more to what his control actually entails?), I'd say the level is alright. Though after you we may have to ban electricity mutants for a while...
History: Would be nice to know if he had any friends or lovers and how the relationship to his family was like ^^
Also there's a slight hint that his parents always liked his kid sister better than him...?
Generally I've got the feeling there's something else missing but can't put my finger on it... Maybe the others will figure out what it is
Sample: It may be a good idea to try and use different ways of referring to Auron. Like using his name or a descriptive "title" like "the electro-powered mutant" or something...
Anyway, that's all I can think of for now ^^
Thanks for applying!
~ Matt
And so she bowed to what she thought was fate and neglected the last of humanity's ancient lies
Re: Auron Black
Hey, thanks for the constructive criticism.
I would like to defend the way I wrote the 'sample post', however. It was meant to be more of an artistic view of his life, as opposed to an actual post, hoping to get a reply.
Normally, I'd refer by name, or by nick-name, but in this case, I wanted to show a bit of the character's present mental state in a serious tone, without destroying the sample post.
However, I've added more detail to everything else, and some fancy-schmancy bold and italics here and there. It's seriously been forever and half a day since I applied a character anyway. And, for the record, I've put a lot of thought into Auron's powers, trying to make them as plausible as possible. ^_^
I also like leaving little bits of the history unknown, like his relationship with his sister, and the way his parents saw this. It'll end up being a major factor for this character's actions, and I'll probably have him fall into a few old memories of the two of them.
The main idea behind Auron, though, is that he's a character with a lot of potential, and a hell of a lot of power, with absolutely no control. One of those dangerous mutants you always see on TV.
Edited by: Zerodus at: 7/21/06 4:15 am
Re: Auron Black
I think what Matt is tryin' to say is that we at NE tend to not like an overuse of 'he' or 'she' when the name or a different descriptive set of words would be good as well. It is nothing against your writing style or any artistic view you may have; that's just a way of encouraging more creativity.
I actually haven't totally read the bio yet, buuuuut if Matt has said you need to tweak something, chances are ya need to do it or you run a chance of the character being rejected. He's like the one everyone dreads though, so don't feel bad!
Also, though leaving the sibling relationship a mystery might be okay in some cases, we really like to use bios as a reference point to make sure that you're keeping up a good continuity. Granted, things may change later and these characters tend to take on a life of their own; it still is good to have that reference point. So, please don't leave too many mysteries in his history. We obviously won't have our characters know anything about your character just because we, the players, read the profile and history, unless your character actually mentions something. Did that sentence make sense or was it a bit confusing? Anyways, point is that we like to know as much as possible. If ya want any examples, you can go through the X-Men Bios section.
Alright, I will check back on the character bio developness later. Right now, I have a cookie in the other room with my name on it. Toodles and good luck!
Angie: -butts into Katie's post- Everyone appreciates creative writing, and it's nice that you put so much thought into what you write, Matt's advice was perhaps to ward off any repetativeness, I'll try and reply to this in the next day or so...I'm a little ill at the moment and just spent ages on some graphics and I got that 'staring at the screen too much' headache for now lol.
Re: Auron Black
Mmkay. With the single exception of Auron's sample post, I've edited the Bio here and there, reflecting the suggestions that were made toward it.
Hopefully, this'll be good. Though, if not, feel free to unload some more constructive criticism, and I'll do my best with it.
Re: Auron Black
ooooook...thinga are all wobbly at the moment and we're under staffed with some holidayers, sickers and the like. Firstly, just a small thing, remember to fully paragraph the posts by leaving a space just to help break up the writing and make reading easier!
Other then that I'll say I can definitely see the promise of creativity you'll bring and can it's good to see some fresh blood around here. I am still feeling rather bleh so if I missed any minor details needing nagging I am sorry but I (and the others) really appreciate your swift edits and replies!
-stamp- I'll give you mine and hopefully you can quickly recieve the other two stamps you need before joining.
Re: Auron Black
Right, I KNEW something was there to nag on... XD ... Please do try and paragraph your texts a bit more (about after ever 100 words) as that's making reading them so much easier
Anyways, have a stamp
You'll need one more - preferably Katie's as she's commented here before - to start playing ^^
Re: Whoo!
*Pops head in* Huh? Someone say my name? Well, I guess if the great and powerful Angie and Matt have given ya a stamp, then I might as well give my small one...
Re: Whoo!
Very well then, please just reply here so we see you know you're in and the bio will be moved
Angie: And you can feel free to postie to your hearts content! Remember to check out the various story developments and the timeline so you can see what's going on... the timeline does have gaps but we're trying to update it as best as possible.. major events are mentioned there. Any questions should be asked without worries, everyone would love to update you on whatever you feel unsure about!
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