She was unsettled to say the least, her eyes acquiring the same stormcloud scene they had had upon her return to the mansion. It had been a huge shock ot her when upon coming across those two young men, she had found out that the Professor who was running this school and sancturary was in a coma. How could it have happened? Could he have gotten ill? No, even if he were in a wheelchair she didn't see him as the frail type... Could he have gotten into an accident? There was a higher possability in that but still, she doubted it.
Anxiety was settling in. If something was wrong with Professor Xavier, did that mean that there might be no help for her? She shook her head, her eyes shifting into a solid copper she placed on them when she was trying to either hide her feelings or be stronger than she really fealt. No, there was still help for her. The help was her being able to at least stay here. She woul try to handle the rest if she had to.... But there was more people who could aid her in containing the energy that resided inside of her.
<But could they really?> The thought invaded her mind and caused her to pause in the hallway that lead to the Headmaster's office. The office that Professor Xavier was supposed to be in but instead, that would hold another when she got there... if anyone at all. <Yes, there has to be at least one other person who could.> She thought back, walking again. But her pace was slowed as her concerns weighed her.
<How? How when there's so much of it trying to break free all the time? How when even a little slip could cause a huge disaster? They don't know how much of that energy is inside of you, you don't even know! All you know is that if you ever relax even the slightest bit over the amount you usually relax, it'll take control and you might not be able to stop it when it does!> She paused again, looking down.
Rain didn't fight those thoughts. Those thoughts were what kept her stressed enough to be tense. It was better this way. At least it kept her in control in between the training. Well, to a point anyway. Still, there ws a slight drawback to the thoughts... if they decame too troubling to her they caused the energy to react to her distress. Just as it was starting to now...
Parts of her skin reddened and she shifted the small backpack some as she felt the burns starting to form under where the straps lay She also adjusted her grip on the luggage bag in her right hand as part of her palm turned an angry red. <Back down! I don't need this happening right now. Please just listen and back down.> She thought, trying to regain the amount of control she had had before. It was hard to force the energy back once it started to break free of her. She was greatful for one thing though. At least it hadn't broken loose to the point where it was coming out of her body...
She could stand the burns and welts that came, having learned how to take care of them to where she wouldn't get any scars... But she couldn't stand it if the energy were to break free and destroy something other than her personal belongings.
Her eyes flickered to a red before flashing back into the copper, her agitation having shown through for a moment. She was angry at the energy almost as often as she was afraid of it. It was the only thing about herself that she seemed to have no control over besides her eyes but the color-shifting of her eyes was fine with her, they didn't cause any harm.
Clenching her teeth and geabbing onto the luggage bag tightly, she forced the energy to obey, feeling it backing down finally to the level she tried to keep it at. A stessed sigh escaped her lips then she started walking again before coming to the door of the Headmaster's office and pausing there. Slowly, she rose her free hand and knocked on the frame of the door.
"Excuse me...." She spoke out, hopefully just loud enough to reach into the room and he heard by anyone who was in there.... if there was anyone there. There had to be someone, otherwise she most likely wouldn't have been directed to this place.
Edited by: zirasharia at: 2/15/06 7:37 pm
It was still strange to be sitting at the headmaster’s desk. That was Charles place. Jeans place. But not his. He supposed it never would be now. Though it had been part of the plan! The great master plan of his life. Lead the team as long as he could and then retire to carry on Charles dream and run the school with Jean. Partners. Together like they always had been.
Yeah sure! It had all sounded so easy. It had also sounded a long way in the future. He had known the years were passing but he had thought he still had time. Everyone did he supposed. Then life came along and reminded you that that wasn’t always the case. Still…..he had been fit, well, more of an athlete than many men half his age.
Scott sighed. There was no point rehashing things again, though it was hard not to. You just had to take things one day at a time and keep hoping that something would turn up. That Hank would pull another miracle out of his sleeve. That somehow the inevitable would be avoided and things would go back to the way they had been instead of the way they now were. The black sling that supported his useless right arm said that it wasn’t very likely though. The pain that only Hank’s cocktail of drugs held at bay shared that opinion.
For now though he could still work, behind a desk at least, helping Jean out with the heavy administrative duties that she had taken on since Charles had fallen prey to the baffling coma that held him a silent prisoner in the advanced med lab. He applied himself to the job with the same rigour and discipline that dominated every aspect of his life, always seemingly calm even when inside his emotions raged.
Control was the essence of his being and Scott hated the disease that was killing him all the more for the fact that it could rob him of it in an instant, sending him plunging into a pit of suffering in which all dignity and restraint was forgotten. But that wasn’t going to happen. Not today at least. He wouldn’t let it. And tomorrow the fight would begin again.
A knock sounded on the door drawing his thoughts back from school records and darker matters and a girl called out "Excuse me....".Come right in Scott called back The doors open.And the office is most definitely open for business.
Re: Headmaster's Office"Come right in... The doors open." It was a man't voice that answered. It wasn't a familiar one but that wasn't a surprise concidering how scarce she had made herself while she had been at the manshion. She hesitated for a moment but quickly got over her shyness as she made her way into the office silently. The man sitting in the chair that was behind the desk, to put it bluntly, looked like he had seen better days. The sling made that obvious if his bodylanguage didn't. Her eyes locked onto the strange visor he wore over his eyes before she realized what she was doing and cast her look downward.
"Excuse me if I am interrupting anything... I was just advised to come here after being told that... The Proffessor is in a come... Well, not told to directly but it being made known to me... I'm sorry.. I should have introduced myself first.. My name is Rain Curington... I believe word was sent that I would be arriving soon..." She stated, her voice quieting a bit at the end as she thought about how furious her father had been in seeing her back without having been unmutated... She cleared her throat and rose her chin a little.
"I was here before but due to some personal things, I had left... But now I have returned, sir, and intend to stay..... if I am still allowed to, that is." She stated. Her burns stung a bit as she started having energy troubles again, the thought of her father having not even bothered to tell her if she would be re-welcomed to the institute or not making her anger rise. Her eyes flickered from the copper she had been forcing them into and into a red before she regained her composure and made them change back.
"May I know your name, sir, and on what happened to Proffessor Xavier?" She asked him, speaking the questions on her mind as she had been taught to by her matrial arts master.
Re: Headmaster's Office
He didn’t know her and she didn’t know him That much was obvious from the way her eyes caught on his visor before looking away embarrassedly. "Excuse me if I am interrupting anything... she said I was just advised to come here after being told that... The Professor is in a coma... Not exactly the subject he expected to be raised by a new student but then again judging by the concern he heard in her voice he was beginning to think that maybe this wasn’t a new student. Despite the suitcase!
It was hard to tell theses days There were so many and lets face it he hadn’t exactly been immersed in the running of the school these past months. Add to that the endless comings and goings that always seemed to be happening as students went through trauma or simply decided that the Institute wasn’t the place they needed to be at that moment in time and it did make it difficult to keep track.
Excuses Scott told himself sternly I bet Jean would recognise her straight off. I need to apply myself more to the files that’s all And lets face it Im going to have the time to do it now. The girl was still explaining though, or trying to at least . “Well, not told to directly but it being made known to me...” Finally she seemed to realise how muddled her phrases could seem and started over.”I'm sorry.. I should have introduced myself first.. My name is Rain Curington... I believe word was sent that I would be arriving soon..."Oh great! I really must be getting old Scott thought, kicking himself for not having consulted the impending arrivals file for that day. Or maybe I just take it too much for granted that Hank has all these things in hand. Looks like this arrival hasn’t opted for the usual guided tour though. I wonder why that is?
Looking closer at his visitor he could see the determination growing in her eyes, eyes that changed colour, though for him they, as all things, only flicked through shades of red, while she told him "I was here before but due to some personal things, I had left.... But now I have returned, sir, and intend to stay..... if I am still allowed to, that is."
Well that did explain a lot. How she knew Charles. Why she didn’t need to be shown around. Personal things. Somehow Scott was sure those two words hid a multitude of problems but it wasn’t his place to pry. She had gone and now she had come back. That was all he needed to know at the moment. Details could come later if and when she wanted to talk about things. And someone would be there to listen if she did. That too was part of what the school was all about No matter who was in charge of it.
As Scott listened he focused on the reddening burns that were now visible on her hands and arms, tell tale signs of a struggle with power and one that apparently that she was having difficulty winning. It was something he recognised though many others wouldn’t have. After all he had energy of his own coursing through his body and control of that had never been something he had possessed. Or rather it was something the plane accident he had been involved in as a child had deprived him of.
Without the ruby visor it would have poured out of him, killing and destroying everything in his path unless he condemned himself to blindness by eternally keeping his eyes closed. Still unpleasant as that option was it did exist. His power was focused at least He wondered if Rains was, hoping for her sake that that was the case otherwise control became that much harder and loss of it even more to be feared.
She had pushed back whatever momentary trouble she had had though, her eyes reverting to bright copper colour they had had when she entered. "May I know your name, sir, and what happened to Professor Xavier?" she asked. Not one for preamble then Scott thought as he answered But then sometimes it is better to get right to the pointScott Summers he said You have probably met my wife Jean. She’s acting headmistress during the professor’s illness. And as for Charles …..Scott sighed. You probably now know as much about his condition as we do ourselves. He is effectively in a coma. What caused it we have no idea. Nor do we know when he will wake up.
It was hard to admit it, harder still to be faced with the reality of the situation. Though knowing Charles I don’t doubt that he will. As for you staying at the school…..that wont be a problem. Im sure we can get you a room sorted out, help you reenrol in classes… But maybe at the moment you’d rather call in at med lab he asked gently. Those burns could do with being looked at don’t you think?
Re: Headmaster's Office"Scott Summers." There, he had given her his name and it took only a second for her to remember the name having been told to her. Yes, Professor Xavier had mentioned the name along with a few others that Rain had quickly tanken into her mental notes. Names were important especially names of the authority figures in a place where she would be living at. "You have probably met my wife Jean. She’s acting headmistress during the professor’s illness." Jean, there was another name from the list of names told to her.
"And as for Charles... You probably now know as much about his condition as we do ourselves. He is effectively in a coma. What caused it we have no idea. Nor do we know when he will wake up." It wasn't a pleasant thing to hear at all. At least not a re-assuring thing. It was a disturbing thing to know that no one knew of the cause of the man's condition. If no one knew the cause then what were the chances of the condition being changed into one that would mean he was recovered?
"Though knowing Charles I don’t doubt that he will." That was slightly comforting although it didn't do too much on lessening her worry. She tensed some as she was made to fight for control again but this time, she managed to gain it before any more burns could arise and before the other burns that were already there could become any worse. It was embaressing to have this problem, nevermind it being while in front of someone. This caused her to examine the floor once more, her having looked up earlier while the man ahd been speaking.
"As for you staying at the school…..that wont be a problem. Im sure we can get you a room sorted out, help you reenrol in classes…" Her head rose up again as the man's words came, her having been taught to look at someone when they were speaking. A slightly relieved look came to her face and her eyes lightened to their origional amber. So she wouldn't be cast out... She really could come back to this place. She didn't have to fend for herself out in the world she had been kept from for almost all of her life. This place wasn't one of the family properties; the walls being half the height, there being so many people, and the gates actually having bars instead of being solid so to give view of the outside world... But it was close enough, it would have to be...
"But maybe at the moment you’d rather call in at med lab. Those burns could do with being looked at don’t you think?" Her eyes shifted to their embaressed blue-green and she looked down quickly, her cheeks tinging with redness. She hadn't looked at the burns, only hoping that they were light enough not to be noticable but evidently they were obvious to the man.
"I... I have a first aid kit in my belongings, Mr. Summers... I won't be needing to go to the med lab.." She declined quickly but at the same time tryingto be respectful about it. There was a hint of nervousness in her tone but that came from the thought of causing the people down at the med lab any time lost on something she could just take care of herself and not bother anyone else with. The mentioning of the kit did give information about the fact that the burns were nothing out of the ordinary for her too.
"I'm used to taking care of my own injuries, sir. I've been doing so for most of my life. I have even set my own arm before so these burns are not a problem." She explained, trying to tell him that it wasn't that she didn't appreciate the offer but that since she was able to do it herself that she didn't want anyone bothered with it.
"As for the headmistress, I have heard of her from the Professor but I haven't met her yet... I've been mainly training and studying so I haven't met many people at all... Only the Professor, the man named Logan, the two I met today: Mr.Connor... I mean Brett... And Mr. Starr... And now I have met you, Mr. Summers." She said, getting herself to look back up to at least try eye-contact so not to be too rude.
"I... I am still unused to the outside world. I've been raised up within the walls of the different properties my family. I wasn't allowed to come in contact with anyone outside of my teachers or family up until..." There came a pause and her head dropped slightly, her eyes falling ot the floor. Her memory flickered to when she had first displayed her abilities... Back when someone had been trying to kidnap her and when she had sent the man flying back with a blast fo energy... Her father had been at first shocked but then had been appauled by finding she was a mutant. Sometimes she thought it was only because of his territorialness that he had even cared she had been in danger of being taken away... It didn't seem to be the same thing if he sent her away though.. And that had been just what he did. Sent her away to this institute and telling her not to return until she was cured...
It wasn't until she felt the pain that she snapped out of it and a startled gasp came from her as she quickly tried to pull the energy back into her body before it came out completely.A couple of small spheres of energy escaped though but only to get puled back into her, causing a couple of red marks to show up on her where they re-entered her. "Please excuse this... I sometimes have trouble keeping it from reacting to some thoughts... But that is something I should have control over. I shouldn't let it slip... ever." She stated.
Yes, she was hard on herself but it ws only because she knew she had to be. She couldn't let herself slip, couldn't afford it. She also couldn't let herself ever relax too much or the energy would just come out against her will and cause damage... "I had a room at the corner of the building on the dorms level... Is it still vacant or has it been assigned to another student?... As for the classes, sir... I wasn't enlisted for any of them.. although I am thinking about trying to get into one one day... You see, I was tutored and trained personally due to my not being allowed to step foot outside of the property walls..." She todl him. There was no sign of the high and mighty air that most tutored rich people gave off. She was only stating the truth.
Rain didn't know that it was a sad thing that she had been kept penned up all of her life. That it was something wrong that she had been kept from the real world. It was all she had known for most of her life.
Re: Headmaster's Office"I... I have a first aid kit in my belongings, Mr. Summers... I won't be needing to go to the med lab she said quickly, her embarrassment clear as was the fact that this was far from being a new problem for her to deal with, even if it was a difficult one. "I'm used to taking care of my own injuries, sir. she went on, confirming his suspicions I've been doing so for most of my life. I have even set my own arm before so these burns are not a problem."
Behind the visor Scott’s eyes narrowed slightly in disapproval. It was one thing to know how to take care of the secondary effects of her power, which was what the burns seemed to be. It was quite another to be expected to mend a broken limb without help. Sure it was something that you had to do in the field sometimes, when there was no other choice. But this girl wasn’t a soldier, was she? Why then should she have had to endure such an ordeal? An accident perhaps? Yes that was the most likely cause he told himself. Though his gut still didn’t seem to accept the explanation somehow.
Cyclops let none of his momentary concern appear on his face as she continued "As for the headmistress, I have heard of her from the Professor but I haven't met her yet... Well that explained why Jean had never mentioned her…. I've been mainly training and studying so I haven't met many people at all... Ok Training and studying were all very well up to a point….. but there had to be some social activity in there as well. Hold on Scott told himself You don’t even know how long she stayed at the Institute before. Lets not get all worked up for what might have been a flying visit. Just let the girl tell her story and then you can react when you have all the facts.
“….. Only the Professor, the man named Logan, the two I met today: Mr.Connor... I mean Brett... And Mr. Starr... And now I have met you, Mr. Summers." It wasn’t an impressive list, at least not as far as making friends went. Teacher!, administrators! The only contact with people her own age a brief encounter in the hall from what he could make out!
And then an explanation! "I... I am still unused to the outside world. I've been raised up within the walls of the different properties my family. I wasn't allowed to come in contact with anyone outside of my teachers or family up until..." She paused then, embarrassed or angry it was hard to tell though Scott would have opted for the latter judging by the sudden display of power that she hurriedly controlled, the effort leaving further marks on the already burned arms.
Damn! He had been right. The energy wasn’t centred as his was. Which no doubt made it a lot harder to live with. Though she was doing not to badly from what he could see. "Please excuse this... Rain said ,as if the momentary lapse was a source of shame, whereas Scott saw the swift suppression of the energy balls to be cause for hope. At least she seemed to have a means of controlling her power even if at the moment it came at a cost.
It wasn’t enough to make Rain feel better about the incident though "I sometimes have trouble keeping it from reacting to some thoughts... But that is something I should have control over. I shouldn't let it slip... ever." It was like listening to a younger version of himself. The same determination! The same pain! The terrible responsibility that the raging energy imposed upon them! I
n the end it led to a loneliness that was hard to bear. Unless you could find those who were willing to share the burden with you that was! People who could understand the need for eternal vigilance and control and see past it to the human being within! People like him and Rain weren’t set apart from the crowd by their appearance in the way Hank or Kurt were. Their barriers were self inflicted and all too necessary. If their powers weren’t to destroy everything around them that was.
Scott watched the girl as she changed the subject, stepping on to safer ground where her powers risked to leave her in peace. "I had a room at the corner of the building on the dorms level... Is it still vacant or has it been assigned to another student?... Simple questions! Important answers, as far as her settling in was concerned, but hardly likely to spark another flurry of uncontrolled emotion. As for the classes, sir... I wasn't enlisted for any of them.. although I am thinking about trying to get into one one day... You see, I was tutored and trained personally due to my not being allowed to step foot outside of the property walls..."
"That’s Ok" Rain he said gently. "Ill pass you a list of classes available and you can see which ones you want to take. And as for your room …let me see." Scott punched up the information he had onto the computer "… you seem to be in luck. Looks like it’s still free. You can move in whenever you like. Though Id still rather you called in at med lab first"
Cyclops stood then and moved round the desk sitting lightly down on the edge of it as he went on. "I know you can handle things by yourself but the point is you don’t have to. There are people here who can help you. And not just with those burns." Scott flashed her a quick smile and then moved to open the nearby window, his left hand lifting to his visor as he did so. The red beam blasted forth from his deadly eyes with its distinctive zapping sound to destroy the branch of a nearby tree.then he closed the visor before turning back to Rain,locking the killing power back safely behind the ruby crystals.
“I was sixteen when my power started to show” he told her. “and unlike you the on off button, so to speak, the part of my brain that was supposed to give me control over it had got broken when I was a kid. So there I was soaking up energy and spewing it out every time I opened my eyes. And I thought there was no way of ever making it stop.”
Even now he remembered the fear he had felt and the helplessness. The impression that he was so different so dangerous that maybe it would have been better for all concerned if he just let the mutant haters kill him and have done. He drew a deep breath chasing the memories before continuing “If Charles hadn’t found me and brought me back here, well…. I think you can imagine what would have happened. ”
"But the point is that he did. He took me in and worked round the clock till he had found a way to give me back that control. And now we will do the same for you. There are people here who can help you work on that control of yours till it becomes second nature and not something you have to fight all the time to maintain. It wont happen all at once that’s for sure" he admitted "but it will happen and we’ll be beside you every step of the way to make sure that it does."
Re: Headmaster's Office"That’s Ok Rain." His tone wasn't anything less than gentle as he began to speak. "Ill pass you a list of classes available and you can see which ones you want to take." He told her. A list of classes right then... She hadn't thought it would come that quickly. Maybe he was one of those people who could pick out his choices quickly, being able to skim through the list an ddeciding which ones she would be alowed to choose from? Surely he wasn't going to let her have the whole list of classes available and let her pick which ones were the ones most appealing to her... Was he? Was this in a way like the ice cream shop she had heard her sisters talk about? Where they didn't only have to choose chocolate or vanilla but had been able to pick out exotic flavors such as mango and banana? "And as for your room …let me see... you seem to be in luck. Looks like it’s still free. You can move in whenever you like." At the statement, Rain smiled. It was a bit of a relief to know that she coud return to the room she had had before, a room she was familiar with instead of having one in a different location. "Though Id still rather you called in at med lab first" As he added that onto the statement, Rain's smile vanished and a look of discomfort crossed her face.
She could handle the burns herself... Did that fact get lost somehwere shen she had been explaining it to him? Or maybe he had doubt in her abilities... That might have been the case. After-all, she hadn't been the best in showing control in the time she had been there in the office. Maybe her lack of control over the energy showed him that she may not have the capability to take care of herself. She gave a small swallow to suppress her emotions but didn't really do a good job of hiding them fully.
Mr. Summers stood up from his seat, moving to the edge to the desk before sitting down on it and continuing. "I know you can handle things by yourself but the point is you don’t have to. There are people here who can help you. And not just with those burns." A smile was sent in her direction before the man moved to the window. The thing that had been covering his eyes was lifted and suddenly, a red beam of light was shot out, its course being out of the window and the targed being a branch of a tree. Then he had the device over his eyes once more, the beam ceasing. She was silent although her eyes were slightly widened, their color changing to a light pink of surprise.
Quickly, she tried to regain her composure, changing them back into a copper then blinking away the startled expression. “I was sixteen when my power started to show... and unlike you the on off button, so to speak, the part of my brain that was supposed to give me control over it had got broken when I was a kid. So there I was soaking up energy and spewing it out every time I opened my eyes. And I thought there was no way of ever making it stop.” She tensed, imagining how it would have been if it had been her in his shoes. It would have been terrible. The thought of it caused her to pale. She didn't know how much destruction there would have been... it wa frightening.
A wrinkle came from between her brows as she thought of how it must have been for him. Being condemned to keeping his eyes closed and being blind or suffering the consiquences be being the source of mass destruction. “If Charles hadn’t found me and brought me back here, well…. I think you can imagine what would have happened... But the point is that he did. He took me in and worked round the clock till he had found a way to give me back that control. And now we will do the same for you. There are people here who can help you work on that control of yours till it becomes second nature and not something you have to fight all the time to maintain. It wont happen all at once that’s for sure.. but it will happen and we’ll be beside you every step of the way to make sure that it does." The man told her.
She flinched ever so slightly as the topic of her own control came up. It was a bit embarrassing that she had given off the feeling to him that this happened often. That she had less control over the energy than she really did. The embaressment turned to curiosity though as she thought of the wings. "I do need help with gaining more control, sir... But there is also something else I am looking to learn." She began, not really knowing how to bring the topic up and jut speaking as she tried to sort her thoughts. The small backpack was removed and placed on the luggage bag beside her and after a moment's hesitation, she stood straight again and looked at Mr. Summers.
"I don't know if this would be concidered help with control but..." Energy spilled out frim two spots on her upper back, formming the crest of the wings first then pouring out further to make the rest. No pain seemed to come from this action but that was only because she had let the wings out willingly. "... but I was wondering if I could be able to learn to use these..." She finished. Right after, Rain, pulled them back into herself.
"And.... as for the med lab........ I strongly believe that I can handle taking care of my burns myself, actually I perfer to take care of them on my own, them not being out of the reach of my ability to just patch them up before I go to setting myself up in the room given to me then training... But since you are an authority figure here and since your requests do hold more importance than my own, sir.... I will follow your direction and go there to be treated...." She said, lowering her head slightly as she spoke. If she hadn't been so strongly against the idea, she wouldn't have brought up the courage to tell him how things were going in her thoughts.
Re: Headmaster's Office
She was proud. He could see that from the look on her face as he talked of helping her to control her powers, as if he should never have been given that insight into her difficulties in the first place. But she wasn’t too proud to admit that he was right. "I do need help with gaining more control, sir...” she admitted though he didn’t doubt that it cost her to do so “But” Ah something else in the voice now apart from the slight embarrassment she had shown before Something that sounded a little like excitement. That would be good. Better than good if there was actually something about this dangerous power that pleased her! "there is also something else I am looking to learn."
He let her take her time, find her own words to explain what she meant. Though it seemed a demonstration was more what she had in mind. The backpack was set down before she turned to him again saying "I don't know if this would be considered help with control but..." The wings painted themselves onto her back, brushstrokes of energy filling them in till they glowed and shimmered in iridescent splendour. Scott caught his breath before their beauty. Yes that was certainly something to be treasured, a strange quirk of her power that might just be worth all the side effects it threw her way. A way perhaps to lessen those effects, he suspected if they worked on it hard enough Though that was a though for another day. "... but I was wondering if I could be able to learn to use these..." Rain asked, reabsorbing the energy with an ease that boded well for the future.
Wings Though he had never admitted it to anyone but Jean, Scott had always envied those who had them. He was a born pilot, his uncanny sense of spatial geometry making him one of the best in the world. Flying was in his blood and he loved it with a passion and yet he would never know what it felt like to soar without a machine surrounding him. As this girl would.! And there were certainly people at the Institute who could give her a few tips in that field Scott thought with a smile. Warren for one, if he ever decided to come back from vacation! Icarus too. No there was no shortage of experts when it came to flying. In whatever form it might happen to take.
However if rain was willing to accept assistance where her power was concerned basic medical attention seemed to be another matter. "And.... as for the med lab....... He could already hear the reticence in her voice even before her words confirmed his suspicions "I strongly believe that I can handle taking care of my burns myself, actually I perfer to take care of them on my own, them not being out of the reach of my ability to just patch them up before I go to setting myself up in the room given to me then training... As if he would let her train before Hank had confirmed she was up to it!” But since you are an authority figure here and since your requests do hold more importance than my own, sir.... I will follow your direction and go there to be treated...."
The look was subservient but the words made her feelings more than clear showing once again the underlying pride that Scott couldn’t help but recognise and respect. “It isn’t a question of not taking your requests into consideration … nor of doubting your abilities to deal with your injuries he explained. It’s just a question of experience and judgement. You can dress your injuries, Hank can heal them. Which will make your training more efficient! If you’re sure that’s what you want to do today that is. Personally I would recommend….”
He stressed the word, accompanying it with a smile to let her know this was just that. A suggestion rather than a command! “ that you give yourself time to settle in again. Maybe look up some friends? Eat at least. Training is important I know and we will give you all the help and support you need to get the most out of it. Including flying lessons! But still….. there is more to the Institute than just that . Why don’t you give yourself a chance to explore its possibilities? Who knows you might get to like them.”
Re: Headmaster's Office“It isn’t a question of not taking your requests into consideration … nor of doubting your abilities to deal with your injuries... It’s just a question of experience and judgement. You can dress your injuries, Hank can heal them. Which will make your training more efficient! If you’re sure that’s what you want to do today that is.” Healing would llow her to do more in her training but it would take too much time. Training wasn't a want with her anymore, it was a need. A need that had been programmed into her over years and years of her following the same schedual. Dressing her wound would be good enough, allowing her to continue with her training instead of sitting it out for whatever amount of time it may take, days or weeks that she did not think she could handle without doing anything.
"Personally I would recommend… that you give yourself time to settle in again. Maybe look up some friends? Eat at least. Training is important I know and we will give you all the help and support you need to get the most out of it. Including flying lessons! But still….. there is more to the Institute than just that . Why don’t you give yourself a chance to explore its possibilities? Who knows you might get to like them.” The man suggested, making it clear it was a suggestion and not an order. "I... I was not allowed any friends while still living with my family, sir... As I said before, I wasn't allowed to come in contact with anyone except for family, teachers, and trainers..." How could she explain to him that she had been avoiding any contact that she could with the other people here for the time she had been here for? For some reason, she had the feeling he would ask why and she didn't know how to answer that well at all.
"Could you tell me how I am supposed to be towards others? I don't know where to start. Every time I come close to someone, I get confused on how to talk to them if I am supposed to talk to them, I have trouble bringing myself to even look at them but I do so because I know it is rude of me to not look at them when they are speaking or I am." She tried to explain. "I wasn't trained in interacting with people outside of the walls. I was educated in business, trained in martial arts, taught how to behave towards those who are on a higher level than myself: authority figures. But interacting with people out there..." She made a gesture with her hand towards the door. "I was not prepared for in the slightest. I was just suddenly from the life I have been living for seventeen years to being sent out beyond the walls of the property andinto a whole new world... There is fear and I admit it. I have no choice but to admit it." She stated softly, lowering her eyes to the floor after.
"That is not why I am not fond of the idea of going to the medical lab though, I would like to tell you that so there is not chance of it being misunderstood. I am not afraid of being treated." She commented, also softly. She scuffed her foot lightly on the floor before speaking again. "Flying would be wonderful, it would be a dream come true to know that these wings can be something that isn't just for show or destruction. Training is a must and I do it every day... And food, I am not sure on if my stomach is ready to hold any at the moment." She told him.
Re: Headmaster's Office
. "I... I was not allowed any friends while still living with my family, sir.. As I said before, I wasn't allowed to come in contact with anyone except for family, teachers, and trainers..."*Why, for the love of god would any parents do that* Scott asked himself as he had unfortunately had to do so many times over the years since he had come to the Institute and worked closely with mutants.
Had she perhaps developed her powers early, making them afraid to bring her into contact with other people? Or was there something more. Some twisted private reason that made them think this was the best way for them to bring up their daughter. That was something only her file would reveal and for the moment he hadn’t had time to consult it. In either case they were wrong, of that he was totally convinced and he was after all something of an expert on the subject.
Sure having a mutant child wasn’t easy, especially if you weren’t actually mutants yourself with some idea of the problems that lay ahead but that was no excuse. There were ways to deal with it that didn’t mean treating your child like some kind of pariah.If you knew how to look for them. *Well at least she’s here now, somewhere she can maybe learn what it is to have at least a semblance of a normal life* he reminded himself.* If we can persuade her to take that first step that is.*
Her next words however seemed to indicate that there was some hope that she was ready to take it , and not just because he had suggested it Or at least he hoped that wasn’t the whole reason for her reaction. Though even if it was he was still ready to seize the opportunity if it meant making some kind of breakthrough! "Could you tell me how I am supposed to be towards others? I don't know where to start.
He had seldom heard such a complete admission of social inadequacy as Rain offered him and it saddened him deeply. “Every time I come close to someone, I get confused on how to talk to them if I am supposed to talk to them, I have trouble bringing myself to even look at them but I do so because I know it is rude of me to not look at them when they are speaking or I am. “
This went far beyond shyness. It was a kind of emotional crippling that made him rage, especially since he knew its source was the very people who were supposed to prepare her for life, not make her inadequate to handle it. And it got worse. . "I wasn't trained in interacting with people outside of the walls. I was educated in business, trained in martial arts, taught how to behave towards those who are on a higher level than myself: authority figures.
What kind of bullshit was this! Lord he sounded more like Logan than himself ,but perhaps the occasion merited it. People on a higher level! Authority figure!. Were they raising a child or creating a servant. And if so for what purpose!
Not to take over the family business that much was obvious. For that you needed to be able to do everything they had made her incapable of doing. Feel at ease. Charm. Command a room simply by walking into it. Look people in the eye and tell them what you were thinking. Damn them because she could have pulled it off.
He could feel that even now No one controlled powers like hers without willpower and character. If they had only let her flourish who knew what she might have been capable of doing. *Yet they sent her here, or at least let her come! I wonder if they really knew what they were doing* Scott asked himself* Or do they too think this is just one huge training facility for mutants designed to get rid of all the unfortunate little draw backs associated with having powers .If that is the case then they are about to learn differently And so with any luck is their daughter*
“ But interacting with people out there..." So much said in two little words and one despairing gesture! "I was not prepared for in the slightest.I was just suddenly ripped from the life I have been living for seventeen years to being sent out beyond the walls of the property and into a whole new world..” Now that was something he understood completely, though his upbringing had been nothing like hers Still there had been two radical breaks in his young life The first when his parents had supposedly died and he had woken up alone in an unknown orphanage bereft of his family. The second when he had been saved from his powers by Xavier and brought here to found a new one!
“ There is fear and I admit it”. her soft voice went on “I have no choice but to admit it." Why did people think that was a weakness? He knew that is wasn’t! Denying your fears was useless. Facing them was everything. Though it took a rare courage to voice them as this girl had done! And maybe that was where his childhood had damaged him, making him unable or unwilling to simply admit he was terrified of what the future held. Even to those who didn’t need him to be strong all the time. Like Jean for example!
Though he had to admit that he was more scared of breaking her than he was of breaking himself! And not because he doubted her strength but rather because he had walked a mile in her shoes! He had lived through her death when it had been quick. He couldn’t imagine doing it if it had been slow as his was going to be. And so he tried to be positive. Brave some would have called it. For her! For Sean! For his team mates! For all the people Xavier’s dream had allowed him to have. And there were many. With a bit of luck this girl would share the same fate. At least if he had anything to do with it!
"That is not why I am not fond of the idea of going to the medical lab though, I would like to tell you that so there is not chance of it being misunderstood. I am not afraid of being treated." she explained, though why she should feel awkward in doing so he found hard to understand. Still it would make Hank’s life easier if there was at least another new student who didn’t have a fear of med lab. Mutants and needles made for a bad combination as Scott was only too well aware. At least that seemed to be one form of abuse that Rain had been spared and for that he was thankful. Though who was to say that the psychological damage wasn’t as devastating!
And yet all was not lost There was still the possibility of delight as her next words plainly showed. "Flying would be wonderful, it would be a dream come true to know that these wings can be something that isn't just for show or destruction. There was a wistfulness in her voice that struck home.*She could be me* Scot realised. *Me as I was then Before Jean! The same type of power The same artificially induced awkwardness.. And inevitably the same devotion to duty.*"Training is a must and I do it every day... And food, I am not sure on if my stomach is ready to hold any at the moment."
“That’s ok” he told her gently “It was just a suggestion. And as for how you should react to the other students” *Hey Jean look at me! Giving advice about emotions! Who’d have thought! Not me anyway Except that I know this girl. For better or for worse! And I’m trying to let my experience make it better!* “ I wasn’t much good at that either when I first got here “ he admitted “but I eventually found that being myself was enough. Though I have to admit it took some time!”
That could just be the understatement of the year! The memories of those solitary times were still burned into his brain, something he wasn’t sure he had ever overcome but that he was more than willing to help Rain surmount if she would let him. “Think about how you’d like them to react to you and do the same and you’ll be fine I’m sure.” he reassured her. "And if you’re not… then call me and I’ll try to help. Day or night!”
It was the only time he could make such a claim, his illness keeping him inevitably at the institute for the first time ever. He had seen it as an imposition, as if no matter what he had said the end of his career in the field had been the end of his usefulness. Now he wasn’t so sure, envisaging a future after the X men that was still useful in a manner that was direct, that could actively affect the lives of future generations…
Somehow his talk with William had been too esoteric to actually bring it home but now, with this girl who was so like him he realised that the dream wasn’t dead. That he could still change the world even if not in the same manner. And somehow that stilled the constant pain better than any of Hanks anaesthetics.
Re: Headmaster's Office“That’s ok... It was just a suggestion. And as for how you should react to the other students; I wasn’t much good at that either when I first got here... but I eventually found that being myself was enough. Though I have to admit it took some time!” Rain watched him as he spoke, eyes shifting to an inquisitive pale blue as she unlocked it from the copper they had been forced into earlier. So she had been right earlier to blieve that it was normal to have hard time knowing how to act around other people...
Since he had gone through this before, surely he knew how to help in this topic. “Think about how you’d like them to react to you and do the same and you’ll be fine I’m sure." He advised. She took in the advice quickly and locked it away in her mind. Why did doing that seem like it was easier said than done though? Come to think of it, she wasn't too sure on how she react to people besides bein as formal as she could be....
"And if you’re not… then call me and I’ll try to help. Day or night!” Rain blinked and was silent for a moment He was offering his help to her regardless of the time? The concept was foreign to her and almost a bit too much to take in. Surely he had other things to do. Everyone had a certian schedual they followed even if some were looser than others. She couldn't accept the statement easily. It was out of her concept range right then. Maybe he meant tre as in he will see if he had time to fit her in? That thought was more easily tucked into her mind.
"I..." She couldn't find the right words to reply with at first, so many thoughts running around in her head but that only lasted a moment before she recovered herself. "I will see what I can do." She told him, bringing herself to be stronger than she really felt at the moment. With that, she offered a small smile. "I appreciate the help you are offering me and have given me. Thank you." She told him. His words meant more than she could allow herself to show. Still, a hint of the importance leaked through in her bodylanguage.
He could see that his offer had caught her unawares, leaving her unsure of how to answer. But that was all right. After all from what she had said she wasn’t used to interacting with people on any level never mind accepting the idea that help and company were now only a phone call away. If she choose to make it that was.
Breaking through such isolation was never easy. But at least at the Institute there were others who had made the same journey, finding a place for themselves within the community that they had never dreamed of. That was an important part of Xavier’s vision. To bring mutants in from lives that seemed condemned to be infinitely lonely and make them part of something greater. A family, a team. This wonderful improbable school that he had devoted his life to building. Just as Scott had.
*Who knows* Cyclops thought with a smile *Maybe in ten or fifteen years this girl will be where I am now. Continuing the legacy. Showing other lost kids that there is somewhere they can belong. And it all begins right here and now*"I..." Rain seemed to have found her voice again if not yet the words to go with it. But they weren’t long in coming. "I will see what I can do." That was a good start, indeed he could ask for no more. His smile widened as hers did, taking pleasure in the courage she showed and the determination that backed it up. It wouldn’t be easy for her he knew but in the end she would be fine. He was sure of that. Even if she wasn’t.
"I appreciate the help you are offering me and have given me” Rain told him sincerely. “Thank you."“No thanks needed” he replied gently. That’s what we’re here for To lend a hand when things get tough and also to take care of you. Even if you don’t want us to!” The words were kind , not scolding, but the message was serious all the same. “So once you’ve settled into your room head down to med lab. I’ll tell Hank to expect you. No matter what you think I promise you training can wait till you’re healed. In fact its going to have to.”
Re: Headmaster's Office“No thanks needed. That’s what we’re here for To lend a hand when things get tough and also to take care of you. Even if you don’t want us to!” Rain's eyes flickered to a black with a horizontal green strip though them as she became a little confused. She wasn't sure if she should be worried or if she should be amused by his words. The tone had been kind but words unusual.
"So once you’ve settled into your room head down to med lab. I’ll tell Hank to expect you. No matter what you think I promise you training can wait till you’re healed. In fact its going to have to.” There was disagreement in her expression and her eyes shifted to a stubborn slate color when the mentioning of not training came up. She would train, that was something she would not be stopped from doing unless they planned on strapping her into a bed until she healed... Which she hoped they would not do.
"I will agree to the going to the medical lab part but I can't say the same for the not training. Not training is something I can't ever agree to." she said. There was a defensive tone to her voice that she hadn't expected to come and surprised by it, she broke out of the mood and looked down, her face a little red from embarrassment. Her eyes were blue-green when she looked up again. She regained some of the stuborn-ness without too much time passing. It was clear that she was not going to give up on training.
"I'm sorry.... I just can't stop training for too long. I have to train and I have good reason for it. I can't allow myself to relax... Sometimes I can't even let myself go to sleep for long. I can never keep from training for too long, Mr Summers, I won't allow myself to. I do not care what kinf of punishment I may get, it is better to train and be punished than not train and risk whatever may happen. It's better than not being able to hold it in..." She told him.
Re: Headmaster's Office"I will agree to the going to the medical lab part but I can't say the same for the not training. Rain told him Not training is something I can't ever agree to." Ok! There was a fine line between determination and insubordination and the girl was just about to step over it. And that was something he wasn’t going to let slide no matter how embarrassed she looked. Or the emotiveness of arguments she offered. Though he had to admit it was impossible not to be moved by them. Moved and worried.
"I'm sorry....” she said, though there was more defiance in her voice than regret. And over it all a growing desperation that spoke more eloquently for her need to heal and rest than anything he had seen so far. “ I just can't stop training for too long. I have to train and I have good reason for it. I can't allow myself to relax... Sometimes I can't even let myself go to sleep for long” What kind of life was that? Not one she could keep up for very long that much he knew from experience. She might think that this was the way to control her power but it wasn’t. Far from it. She was in fact only wearing herself away. Driving herself down a pitiless road that would only lead to her own destruction.
I can never keep from training for too long, Mr Summers, I won't allow myself to. Well just for once she wouldn’t be the one doing the allowing. Whether she liked it or not. “I do not care what kind of punishment I may get, it is better to train and be punished than not train and risk whatever may happen. It's better than not being able to hold it in..."
“This isn’t a question of punishment” Scott replied, his voice not unkind but poised and strict, reminding her that if he had spoken to her as a friend he was also more than that. He was a teacher, a leader and one who was not about to have his orders disobeyed. “Nor are my terms negotiable. You have come to the school for help and support Rain and that is as I already said offered freely and gladly. But in return you have to trust us to have your best interests at heart and to know how to deal with problem powers like yours.”
You may feel that pushing yourself like this is the best way to handle things and yes, probably up until now it has been. In so far as it was the only option open to you. But that has changed, you are no longer in this alone and believe me that will make all the difference.
So, you will go to med lab and you will let Dr McCoy examine you. And then he will make the decision as to when you can begin physical training again. Scott sighed, a smile softening his words a little as he went on , though never hinting that his directions were to be questioned. “And don’t worry. Hank is one of the kindest men I know. And one of the most intelligent. I would put my life in his hands any day of the week. And I know he will keep you safe and in control. Without having to kill yourself in the process as you are doing now. And that after all is what we all want, isn’t it?
Re: Headmaster's Office
Rain was silent as Mr Summers spoke. “This isn’t a question of punishment." He told her. That brought slight relief but his next words caused her to look down. “Nor are my terms negotiable. You have come to the school for help and support Rain and that is as I already said offered freely and gladly. But in return you have to trust us to have your best interests at heart and to know how to deal with problem powers like yours.” The man said. Rain hand't come to the school herself. She had been sent here. And since she didn't know the outside world to be able to try to be on her own, she was caged here. Yes, she wanted help even if she wan't too sure of the support part... but she wasn't sure if she could handle the help it if involved her not using the precautions she had learned to use to keep herself and nothers safe.
"You may feel that pushing yourself like this is the best way to handle things and yes, probably up until now it has been. In so far as it was the only option open to you. But that has changed, you are no longer in this alone and believe me that will make all the difference." If she could, she preferred it if she could keep on with what seemed to be working for her until they found another way. But it was looking like she wouldn't have the choice.
"So, you will go to med lab and you will let Dr McCoy examine you. And then he will make the decision as to when you can begin physical training again." It wasn't a suggestion this time no matter how much he may have softened his smile. She looked up with pale slate eyes and gve a nod to show that she understood.
“And don’t worry. Hank is one of the kindest men I know. And one of the most intelligent. I would put my life in his hands any day of the week. And I know he will keep you safe and in control. Without having to kill yourself in the process as you are doing now. And that after all is what we all want, isn’t it?" He commented. "I will go to him, Mr. Summers. Thank you." Rain replied in soft but serious tones before excusing herself and leaving the room. She had been given the tour of the building when she had first come and Rain remembered where the Medical Lab was so she headed in the direction to it once she was out in the hall.
She hadn't actually met the doctor, him having been busy at the time that she had been given the tour, but she had been told about him and of how his appearances may be a bit startling to those who first see him. Rain braced herself for that, not wanting to offend him with the reaction of shock.
Edited by: zirasharia at: 6/28/06 7:43 pm
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