The wonder of the driverless van had helped the moment pass, excitement and curiosity pushing fear back a little though not managing to eradicate it completely from Connors eyes. It had also given Logan time to pick up the drugs Amlarie had left, hiding them from sight in his shirt till he had time to slip them surreptitiously into the back of the vehicle as he manoeuvred the bike down onto the driveway. The medication would get back to the Institute soon enough that way. No need to have its intrusive presence digging into them on the journey home reminding them all of what had happened to Connor. Not that they were really able to forget.
It had felt strange helping his son put the helmet on, as if suddenly the years had rolled away transporting them both back to a time where tying shoelaces and buttoning up coats had been a challenge. One that a father had been there to help with. Though maybe not often enough. Likewise the sensation of having Connor’s arms around him, even if it was only for the space of the journey had touched a chord deep in Logan’s being. He supposed he should have expected it, the physical reassurance that despite all his fears his son was safe once more was bound to stir up emotions.
But that wasn’t the only contact that surprised him Chris’s small form was snuggled happily in front of him, trusting Logan to keep him safe as the bike roared through the streets its pace reasonable as far as Wolverine was concerned but more than fast enough to bring gasps of excitement from the youngster. It made Logan realise that this boys life was now in many ways actually in his hands, a responsibility and a challenge that he was determined to rise to. Whatever mess Amlaries intervention had plunged them all into they would put it right. Together. And it was down to him to make that happen.
At least he wasn’t going to have to do it alone. The reassuring gates of the school came into view, the sight causing Logan to relax as if this was the finishing line of some race he hadn’t been sure he would be able to complete. Security was soon negotiated a pleased smile crossing the resident Jaimie’s face as he realised who was coming home. Logan couldn’t help but return it though he was till concerned as to how Connor would react to the whole set up. Would it ring a bell. Would the sight of the school where he had lived for so many years open some doorway into his memories . Or would he instead be looking at it with fresh eyes seeing it as if for the first time and judging it accordingly?
Logan remembered his own suspicion when he had first come to the mansion, his intimate conviction that there had to be some hidden agenda behind the professors kindness. Weapon X had taught him that compassion was a myth fostered only to obtain certain ends, that love was a lie and that friendship was just a prelude to betrayal. All lessons it had taken him years to unlearn and which he had managed to overturn only thanks to the people he had found within these walls. To him this was more than just a school It was a sanctuary. Not a peaceful one certainly. Never that. It was full of life and problems and students with powers and stories that most people wouldn’t believe. No not peaceful. But if you gave it a chance it was a place where you could put a broken life back together again and learn to live it.
Ith these thoughts going through his mind Logan pulled the bike into the garage and helped Christo dismount before making sure Connor could remove the helmet without anxiety. Then he led them up the stairs and finally into the front hall seeing it for once as they must have. The great staircase winding upwards, the panelled wood , the young people laughing and talking as they made their way to and from classes. Well here we are boys he said softly. Welcome home son. Welcome to Xavier’s School for Gifted Children.
There's just somethin' wild inside me pullin' me to do things I don't understand.
I can't figure it. It's like tryin' to explain desire.
It was just a helmet, though no matter how many times Connor thought that as he stared at the safety gear he felt rising panic at the thought of slipping it over his head. Logan assured him, helped put it open, proved to Connor that it wasn’t as bad as he imagined once the visor was lifted. It felt nice though, knowing there was something there to fuss over him, to make sure the helmet was on, secure, that Connor was ok and that it wasn’t too much for him.
Holding Logan… that was strange, was Connor holding a father or a stranger? The thought that this guy was a father to him was enough to draw Connor’s arms tightly around the man as they drove, a sense of security falling over the blue eyed boys as both settled against the older man. Chris’s excitement on the ride helped boost Connor’s own, and despite Wolverine acting as a barrier between the boys the two still managed to call out to each other playfully.
The drive up towards the school as intimidating for Connor, though Chris wasn’t sure what to think and after the whole Liberty X thing he was pretty sure no other building to surprise him. Connor’s fingers tightened their hold on Wolverine a little, anxiety started to swell as his bright eyes peered around unsurely at the surroundings. No rushing memories, no familiar faces, granted they were only at the gates and the guy Logan talked with was only one person, but already Connor’s spirits sunk a little.
The Garage was also not bringing back any memories… what had Connor hoped for exactly? That every step would open a new memory to him? The garage would be of any help anyway, Connor didn’t exactly hang about there, not with all the petrol and gasoline smells fuming about the area, plus the students who would occasionally be fixing cars and bikes and revving them constantly. The noise was unbearable for Connor, and the smell was sickening. But right now, with his dulled senses, Connor didn’t find any issues with the place… no… that was a lie, it wasn’t exactly the cleanest place on earth, though Cyke tried hard, students tended to make a large mess, something unavoidable when putting cars together… and the ground was anything but spotless.
As soon as the helmet came off, Connor’s whole body seemed to ease of a tension he didn’t realize he had, his hands gladly brushing his hair from its flattened state. Chris hovered close to Connor as they followed Logan up the stairs. People! Students… the way they laughed and talked amongst each other, it reminded Connor how lonely he had been without friends of his own. Were any of these people his friends? Connor stared at two boys, who looked about his age, but they didn’t know Connor well at all, they knew Wolverine, and knew Connor’s face, but that was it.
"Well here we are boys" Both Chris and Connor glanced at each other, it wasn’t so easy to decide if they were worried or thrilled by this… it seemed to be settled somewhere in the center, anxiety and nerves causing them to hesitate in their reply. "Welcome home son. Welcome to Xavier’s School for Gifted Children."
"Gifted?" Connor’s bright eyes turned towards his father, a curious and uncertain look on his expression as he made one single comment on that introduction…
Re: Homecoming.Gifted? One simple word that required a not so simple explanation! Logan had kind of hoped that it wouldn’t be necessary. That setting foot in the place that had been his home for so long would have been enough to jog Connors memories. But that obviously hadn’t happened and now it was down to Wolverine to find a way to tell Connor exactly what type of school Xavier’s was. And hope that he liked what he heard. Because lets face it there wasn’t much Logan could do if he didn’t.
Yeah he said slowly. Xaviers is a special school for pretty special kids. Kids with….gifts….like ours. He was still beating around the bush, trying to find a way to present things that wouldn’t scare Connor off and it wasn’t his style. Shit it sounds as if I’m ashamed of what we’re doing here Logan thought suddenly. And that isn’t true It isn’t even remotely true.
Look guys he said decisively, making sure to include Chris in the conversation, for after all his future was concerned just as surely as Connors was, at least in the short term till they located his parents. “What I’m trying to say is that the students here are mutants. Or at least the vast majority of them are. The teachers too for that matter.
He stopped and turned to look at them, his face serious as he went on, wanting them to understand this part of his life, of their lives now if they chose to stay. It’s like this he explained taking a deep breath The world isn’t always an easy place for mutants to get by in. There are people out there who want to use us and others who are just plain scared. And maybe they have a right to be he admitted frankly. Some of the powers the kids here possess are pretty scary Especially if they don’t know how to control them.
He thought of the destructive power of Cyclops, held in check only by the ruby lenses that the professor had designed for Scott. Of the cataclysmic force that Jean had wielded as Phoenix . Of his own destructive instincts, fostered and honed by weapon X to finally be gentled by the wisdom and friendship he had found within these walls. The new generation of students was just as deadly and just as troubled. And the world was just as cruel despite all they had done to change things. This was why the Institute was so important, if he could just make Connor and Chris see that! Without freaking them out at the same time that was.
That’s why Charles, Charles Xavier I mean set up this place So that young mutants would always have somewhere to come to when things got hard! . Charles! If he had been there it would all have been so much easier. He could have explained. He could probably have cured Connor in the blink of an eye. But he wasn’t. He was lying in some sort of a coma that none of them could break. Not even Jean. Certainly not a feral killing machine like himself! And that was hard to come to terms with, as if suddenly their father had been taken away and they were left to deal with things in his staid. Whether they felt capable of doing so or not!
But Logan was a father himself, even if by his own standards he wasn’t a good one And that meant he had to try. And he was going to give it his best shot. To explain Xavier’s dream as Charles would have himself He owed Xavier that much. And so much more! His sanity! His life! Ultimately the son he was now trying to relate to.
The Institute is here so that mutants who are lost and desperate can find people like them who have gone through what they are going though and who could can help them deal. Who can say they understand what is going on and mean it. He smiled now, though it was a shy smile, as if he had revealed a part of him that had previously been hidden. Or was making a claim that he wasn’t truly sure he could fulfil. That’s why I teach here. Because I believe in what Charles is trying to do. And I think you do too Connor. Even if you cant remember that for the moment.
There's just somethin' wild inside me pullin' me to do things I don't understand.
I can't figure it. It's like tryin' to explain desire.
Re: Homecoming.
"Yeah" Something about that replied forced Connor to brace himself for the new topic he unwittingly brought up. "Xaviers is a special school for pretty special kids. Kids with….gifts….like ours." Gifts? Connor almost resentfully rubbed his sore arms, though Logan did say he had abilities, ones which were suppressed by drugs of some kind. Chris felt like he was standing somewhere he shouldn’t be, the way Logan spoke it made the place sound very mysterious and important and he felt somewhat intimidated not knowing what was going on or what he was diving head first in. All that mattered was that ‘James’ still stood beside him and things still promised to be better then what they once had been. Heck, Chris was sure like couldn’t get that bad… not that he hated it, but he liked the new life better then the old one… even if he did miss his mum sometimes, he found himself glade she left him for once, glade that he had a chance to see life with another view… another set… like the other kids he’d watch walking down the street hands in hands with other family members, with friends or siblings, mothers or fathers… all he had ever wanted was to see what it was like to be like that, to dress in new clothes and walk with a full stomach. To point and ask and know there was such a great chance of getting it.. whatever it was.. new toy, sweet… a pet. So often Chris watched as children pointed to the window down by the pet shop, giving their parents the pleading look he often did himself when he was caught behind a restaurant scavenging for scraps.
"Look guys" Both boys looked at Logan, Chris looking up from beside Connor and Connor looking away from two male classmates (not that he remembered) who were lingering by the stairs and taking note of the once lost student’s return. The way they looked at him Connor could clearly tell they recognized him and that they were interested in the fact he was back… the thought struck him that Logan really wasn’t the only one here who he’d be involved with. There were others now… people Connor knew before his memory issues, friends, other family? Teachers and students. He knew that of course before he came here but… it all suddenly became so much more real. "What I’m trying to say is that the students here are mutants. Or at least the vast majority of them are. The teachers too for that matter." Teachers, students, all mutants… Chris looked up at James thoughtfully, though Connor himself wasn’t sure how to take the news… why did they live in a school of mutants, not that he had a thing against them… but… was there a specific reason? Was it because they wanted to live here or was it because they had no choice in the long run? He saw his father’s claws… he saw how frightful the man could be… maybe Connor was just as frightful, maybe they couldn’t live anywhere else because of that.
"It’s like this" The older man was facing them now, talking and looking as if every word dripped with a seriousness of a secret being passed on. "The world isn’t always an easy place for mutants to get by in. There are people out there who want to use us and others who are just plain scared. And maybe they have a right to be" That wasn’t assuring, Connor lowered his eyes for a moment, not wanting to listen to what Amlarie had already made adamantly clear. Humans were cruel, and they always would be. "Some of the powers the kids here possess are pretty scary Especially if they don’t know how to control them." Were his? Connor’s weight shifted from one foot to the other as he adjusted his stance, looking slightly more frustrated as his fingers carefully massaged the tender muscles of his tensed arms.
"That’s why Charles, Charles Xavier I mean set up this place So that young mutants would always have somewhere to come to when things got hard!" Slowly Connor let his arms fall to his side, listening to the tone of his fathers voice change slightly with the mention of this ‘Charles Xavier’. Affection? Admiration? Connor figured that’d be understandable if the guy was bringing misunderstood kids off the street in order to live better lives outside the scorn of their human brethren.
"The Institute is here so that mutants who are lost and desperate can find people like them who have gone through what they are going though and who could can help them deal. Who can say they understand what is going on and mean it." And yet still… Connor wagered not many have sat in his situation, so few can specifically say they understood what he was going through… But that was being rather picky and Connor wasn’t really going to fuss over that much. Things happened and he’d have to deal with that.
"That’s why I teach here. Because I believe in what Charles is trying to do. And I think you do too Connor. Even if you cant remember that for the moment." Chris was offering a proud smile up at Connor and the blue-eyed mutant was torn between the other two’s more upbeat disposition. Oh well… things were going on the up and his life wasn’t really that bad… he had food, family, a roof over his head… for now that was enough, learning the titbits of his life will come … and hopefully they’ll come sooner then later and Connor will be able to snugly return to the lifestyle he couldn’t remember.
"I’m sure I do." Connor agreed with a rather ‘if you say so’ attitude that he hadn’t noticed was there, slipping by his mind as he distracted himself with wondering what was here and how people went about day to day habits in here. "Do we live together or in separate rooms?" Was he avoiding getting into further details? He didn’t think so… there were so many things he had to take in, he seemed to just have started taking it all in his stride in order to negotiate his way through things later when he had time to sit down and think them over. Chris’s small hand found it’s way to Connor’s, though his eyes scampered across the hall, not liking the idea of separate rooms but not wanting to make any fuss until he knew for sure what was going on…
"Was this a castle?" Chris hadn’t seen schools so big before… he hadn’t seen schools really, only from the outside and the ones in the city were closed off with tall fences and so he couldn’t see what they were like inside. But this was huge! Like in the stories the old men on Church Way Avenue would tell him, the homeless folks make Chris’s lonelier days without his mother much better, he considered them like uncles in many ways, plus Julia, who spoiled the boy whenever he was around… well… as best as she could all things considering. "Have you been in every room?" Surely not!! Chris would have loved to rush off and explore with Connor but he knew that would be for later if at all, and right now all he could do was ask the questions his young mind deemed important and exciting!
Re: Homecoming.
He had been worried that the whole ‘mutant’ issue would phase them but they seemed to take it well enough. Either that or they were doing a good job of hiding it their concern. Still, maybe when everything in the world seemed strange and confusing, as it must have done for Connor, a school full of people with weird powers was just one more thing to be assimilated. As for Chris……he looked as if he had hovered between being intimidated and being fascinated and come down on the more positive side.
Connor however sounded less convinced as to his own previous enthusiasm for the school and what it stood for. "I’m sure I do." was all he said to Logan’s assertion that they both shared Xavier’s vision though his tone said he was very far from being sure of anything. "Do we live together or in separate rooms?" The change of subject was abrupt, catching Logan off guard, though the question was a pertinent one. He didn’t get a chance to answer it though since it seemed Chris had some questions of his own. "Was this a castle?" he asked , his eyes shining as he looked up at Logan. "Have you been in every room?"
Wolverine had to chuckle. "Naw kid" he said warmly "It’s not a castle Even if it does look a bit like one. Know how you feel though. Took me like that the first time I saw it too. It’s what they call a mansion and I know it pretty well. Though I admit I haven’t been in every room. The girl’s showers and places like that do tend to be out of bounds" he added with a wink at Connor. "Ill give you a tour later if you like" he offered speaking as much for his sons benefit as for that of this boy he had only just met and somehow found himself in charge of. "Though maybe we should go and see where you’ll be staying first?"
Which brought him back to the subject Connor had raised. "And to answer your question Connor….. We have an apartment in the school. You and your sisters have rooms there where you can crash whenever you want to. Though recently you’ve all sort of moved out into your own dorm rooms. Doesn’t stop you dropping by to raid the fridge, I’ve noticed." he added with a grin. Logan started walking towards the staircase as he spoke leaving the ultimate decision of where they went next to Connor but knowing that in either case they had to head upwards. "So which do you want to see first?" he asked "Your room or the apartment? Either is good by me."
There's just somethin' wild inside me pullin' me to do things I don't understand.
I can't figure it. It's like tryin' to explain desire.
Re: Homecoming.
"Naw kid" Connor’s father responded somewhat happily "It’s not a castle Even if it does look a bit like one. Know how you feel though. Took me like that the first time I saw it too. It’s what they call a mansion and I know it pretty well. Though I admit I haven’t been in every room. The girl’s showers and places like that do tend to be out of bounds" Though Chris took that as fact since his mother drilled it into him that when she went to the toilet he wasn’t allowed to follow her, even if she was in there for hours.. he didn’t know what she was doing but she always looked rather sick if she was in there for too long. Connor on the other hand raised a brow and found it surprising that someone who looked like his father did had …well…humour. "Ill give you a tour later if you like" Both boys seemed interested, though Chris looked far more excited and Connor seemed just highly curious in his usual toned down manner. A slight nod came from the eldest Enright and a more thrilled grin beamed from Chris who clutched Connor’s hand in a vibrant tug of enthusiasm as if it were a treat they had just been offered.
"Though maybe we should go and see where you’ll be staying first?" Both boys seemed to tune into that comment more focused and serious, this was a big thing, Connor’s home inside this mansion, his corner of the world. It was important to both of them, Chris wanted to see where Connor had come from just as much as Connor himself.. at least that’s how it appeared on the outside.
"And to answer your question Connor….. We have an apartment in the school. You and your sisters have rooms there where you can crash whenever you want to. Though recently you’ve all sort of moved out into your own dorm rooms. Doesn’t stop you dropping by to raid the fridge, I’ve noticed." An awkward smile came on Connor’s features, unsure if that was a good or bad comment, despite the current smile Logan showed. Speaking of fridge… Connor felt very thirsty, maybe he could ask for a drink when they got to the room. Though which room? Connor figured he didn’t have a fridge considering he went to his father’s place, though he did have a small one to store mostly drinks and nibbles, at the moment Connor pondered what he wanted. Visit the old room or visit the family room? Both would probably jerk a few memories, at least that’s what he hoped.
"So which do you want to see first?" It seemed they were all walking already, before Connor even mentioned what was his choice. "Your room or the apartment? Either is good by me." The boys glanced at each other, Connor’s brow slightly creased in thought for a moment before he looked up at his father.
"I would like to see the apartment… perhaps my room later when I am more comfortable." The words could have easily lead on to ‘to be left on my own’ since Connor preferred to examine his room when there weren’t others there to disturb him, at least that’s how he thought of it right now… but he didn’t want to be alone and he would prefer one thing at a time at this point. "May I have a drink when we get there?" He asked, preferring to state it now instead of heading into the place and suddenly declaring it… well… he wasn’t sure why again, it just seemed… as if there was the slightest chance it could be taken wrong.
Re: Homecoming."I would like to see the apartment… perhaps my room later when I am more comfortable." Connor said, his voice still understandably a little strained as he tried to adapt to the unsettling situation he suddenly found himself in. It sounded like a good decision to Logan. To be honest it was the answer he had hoped for though he had been equally prepared for Connor to have decided to go off on is own , to see the place he had made for himself rather than the familly background he had come from. Though to be honest knowing where he had come from was probably the most important thing in the world right now as far as his son was concerned. Logan only hoped he would like what he discovered….or be able to live with it at the very least.
"May I have a drink when we get there?" So polite! So formal! As if he was being invited to stay with a stranger rather than coming back to his own home. Logan sighed *That’s probably what it feels like to him though I wish it didn’t.* he reminded himself *Still at least he’s here and that’s a start .And a hell of a lot more than I had hoped for this morning. The rest will come with time. And patience. Though that’s never been Connors speciality has it?*Wolverine thought with a smile.* Guess he gets that from his old man. Ah well we’ll both just have to make an effort. I suppose. And maybe cross a few fingers as well *
“Sure Connor, you can have anything you want when we get to the apartment.” he told his son “The fridge is always well stocked…unless your sisters have emptied it again while I was out. Which is always a possibility knowing those two!” They walked as they spoke, mounting the stairs getting ever closer to their destination. Soon they were in front of the door, the name plate clear in the centre of it.
Enright! Not Howlett! Even the surname he had given to this boy wasn’t his own. But then that had been a conscious choice. He hadn’t given his name to Michelle either as if somehow that act would protect her and the children from his dangerous legacy. Yeah well that had worked a treat hadn’t it! Only Arisa, declared herself his daughter each time she introduced herself. One family! Two names! Something he would have to explain soon enough But not just yet, thank god. That at least could wait for another day.
For now though they could hope for a miracle, that the sight of the familiar apartment might jog some corner of Connors memory and set him back on the road to recovery. "Here we are then" Logan said as he unlocked the door and stepped inside. "Home! "
Shit! It was just as well that Connor didn’t have his senses up and running! Logan hadn’t realised quite how much Lorilli's scent had lingered, all too obviously declaring that he had had a woman not only in the apartment but in his bed, even if it wasn’t for the usual reasons. Something he had never done since they had moved there, all too well aware that his having a relationship of any kind seemed to be the one sin his kids would never forgive. *Please don’t let the girls explode when they come down* he prayed silently. *Sure they can give me a bawling out afterwards if they want to but not in front of Connor. Not right now a least!*
“ Why don’t I get you that drink while you have a look around” he said covering any sign of momentary unease by heading for the kitchen area. “That’s my room over there” he went on swiftly, nodding towards one of the closed doors “Madison’s. Arisa’s. And that one there is your room Connor. I’m sure Chris would like to see it.Take your time though theres no rush. Just take things at your own pace and Ill be here to answer any questions you might have whenever you need me.”
....................
TBC in the Family dorms!
There's just somethin' wild inside me pullin' me to do things I don't understand.
I can't figure it. It's like tryin' to explain desire.
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