It seems that just as I have come to find Tessa again we're to be parted. This time there's no one to blame though. Not my parents, not her parents and of course not her, never her. I was the one who decided this time that I had to go.
Perhaps we're at the point where we've gotten too close. I can feel her sometimes and I know she can feel me, with or without faerie powers. It sounds stupid and sappy but there's something there, somekind of connection. I'm bringing her down though and it was her giggling, her cheerfulness I always missed growing up. I can't rob her of it now, not when she needs it more than ever.
I've changed and she's the only person who knows it. I'm not like I used to be, ever since that trip into the other world I've been different. Maybe I came back different than when I left or maybe I'm just growing up. God I don't know. The point is I've left the academy now and I'm going home again. God only knows what I'm going to do there, luckily my powers aren't too visible but still someone will find out and I'll have to do it all over again.
I can't stop thinking about that dimension and the evils in it, evils we're not even able to fight. They're all alone there even when surrounded by people and I think I picked that up. I'm not sure if I'll be okay but I'm going to try. I left two days ago and I've already called Tess twice. It's gonna be difficult to be apart again, I'd gotten used to her really, but at least this time we'll keep in touch. Tomorrow I've arranged to talk to Cameron too since I didn't get to say a proper goodbye. Seems strange to be back in my own bed again but I guess I'll get used to it.
Tomorrow I'm off to my old school again but at least there's only another month or so until grad. Maybe then I can come back to the institute or something but not right now. I just need some time to think and to get over it. When everything's better and when I'm not bringing my friends down I'll come back. The only problem is I'm not quite sure when that will be.
Clayton Holmes Winters
Cassie Pryde-Shade
Dearest Diary,
Go figure. It's so typical that I just get to the institute and am finally starting to settle in when I get pulled out. I just don't get it though. I mean my mom is helping me out with my powers then she sends me off to Xavier, which she wanted to do as soon as she figured out I had powers, now she's taking me back again. Honestly can't she make up her mind?
It's so not fair. Well at least I get to see Edwyn again. He left too, never really found out why, so I guess my mom just decided I should go too. Don't ask me, it makes no sense, I know. The good part is I can finally get up the nerve to ask out that cute guy from Chem. class who I kept making eye contact with all last year. It'll be great to see my old friends again too although I'll have to think up some sort of a story. Kinda sad leaving here, it's become like home but I guess home will feel like home again in awhile. Okay so that didn't make any sense you get the idea.
I'm just glad I can finally be around more kids my own age, not to mention getting to actually use my powers for whatever I want instead of having to control them whenever a teacher is around. I miss mom too even if she is half insane to call me back. I never thought I'd say it but I really do miss home. Before I couldn't wait to grow up and move out but now I'm not so sure. I guess that's what you call ironic.
Love,
Cassie
Nick Knight
Journal,
Funny really. In all my years I hadn't thought to keep a journal, perhaps because every moment, each memory is kept perfectly inside my brain. Yet being in this town of mutants and hearing of vampires different from myself and of a world far worse than this one I think one begins to ponder their own lives and their mortality. What would happen if I never made it back to Toronto? I'd still want Nat to know where I'd been and that I never stopped thinking of her. I cannot trust a messanger, they'd twist my words around and so it's best that I write to her directly in hopes that one day we'll be together again.
It's been awhile and I had almost thought that I'd lost him forever but Lacroix is like a bad penny. He always turns up. This time though I find I don't mind so much. Bad relationship or not he is the one who brought me across and made me what I am. I hate him for it and yet I don't, all depends on which lifetime I'm living in. This time Nick Knight doesn't mind though, he's ready to go.
This town holds nothing more for me although the vampires Spike and Angel were kind while I was in their company. It is time to get a new identity and move along though, Lacroix is calling to me and Janette is with him too. It seems a lifetime since I've seen her although I know it is not and I still need to apologise deeply to her. It was I who turned her back and made her again into a vampire when she was to die in peace. For that I wonder if she hates me still. A vampire can after all, quite literally, bear a grudge for more than a lifetime. I know because I have.
I still long to return to Natalie and to Tracey but there is nothing for me in Toronto yet. It still will take time and although I have come far I still need to grow and make my amends. In Toronto I have only brought pain. Lacroix calls to me again and I am bound to follow only this time I do it willingly. There is much to catch up on for the last time I saw him he saved me from suicide while this time I am nowhere near that gone. This town is strange, full of mutants and other creatures a place where a vampire could settle down but not I. Perhaps I shall take Nick Angel as my next name in memory or perhaps not. Whatever happens I shall return whether it be in this lifetime or in another.
Sincerely yours,
Nicholas
Nalani Ungaro-Upgrade
Dear Diary,
I've always been the uptight one. The clean freak and the goodie two shoes who always does everything the teacher says. Why then did I actually ask my parents to take me away, back home? To this moment, even now sitting on my bed in good old Hawaii I haven't been able to figure it out really.
I liked it at Xavier's. I mean not only did I get to use my powers and learn about them there was also the good academics, the missions to save humanity and good people. I know already that I've made some friends I'll be keeping in touch with. At least I'm not alone though. I wonder if there's something in the air calling us all to leave for Cassie and Clay have gone home too. Frankly I'm not surprised Clay left but my diary isn't a place for gossip and for talking about other people behind their backs so I'll let it go.
The point is I think I'm actually going to miss it there. The idea of returning to my old school is daunting and although I have friends it's been awhile since I was home. What if they've all moved on? At least my powers are discreet and I don't have to worry about hiding them. Must be difficult for someone with pyro abilities or something like that.
I've got Halle, Loni, Tessa and Clay's phone numbers and I'm going to call them them at least twice a wek until I get settled back in...if I get settled back in. I mean my parents are terrific but it'd just not the same as at Xavier's. Of course by now you're wondering well then why did you leave? As I said before I just don't know. I didn't want to leave but I didn't want to stay either and it seems that whatever my choice I'll regret it and wish I had picked the other option. I don't think I could have done my best on our team, maybe that's it. Clay's been..well the best word for it is distant since he switched worlds for awhile and of course I don't blame him but it's so hard to concentrate when he's there now. He seems lonesome and I guess that's why he left. Go figure I leave the day before him. At least I told everyone though, he left without much notice, just to Tess, Cam and I really.
I'm sure I'll come back though, perhaps as a teacher. I know I'd find that interesting. I have a gift with kids and my powers only help out with that so if they'd take me back I'd like to be a teacher I think. In the meantime though I've got to concentrate on graduating High School. The doorbell's ringing and an old friend was going to bring over a package of catch up and stuff which I should probably go through being the good student and all. I've got to go but I'll write later and I promise to tell you everything Loni, Tess, Clay and Halle say.
Love,
Nalani Ungaro
Drian Macneil-Prometheus
Journal,
I'm not the type to talk to myself or to keep a journal but then I didn't think that a rebel from a world of evil would be the type to be able to make their home in another world like this. I guess there's a first time for everything.
It's been a week and I still don't feel any nearer to fitting in here than when I arrived. At least I've got Aisha though. Funny how roles in life reverse. She's been here a week longer than me and all of a sudden I'm the student as she patiently shows me around. Life plays tricks on you that way, twists everything around beyond recognition. Nothing you can do about it.
I've never been one to sit back and watch the world turn though and maybe that's the problem. Here there aren't people getting brutally whipped or murdered every night. There's evil of course, there isn't a such thing as a world without evil even in the movies, but people don't cry out as plainly for help. I guess I don't know what to do with myself. Here at this Xavier place there are people who care and they try to help. Problem is there's so many of them that I just blend in. I'm used to being the leader of a pack, a true rebel who leads people to freedom and glory. Here I'm just another face in the crowd, a well meaning crowd but still just a crowd. I don't even know the names or the stories of people I'm helping anymore. Here it's help and get lost, there it was learn about them, protect them. Things change and maybe I'm not ready for them.
Problem is while I may be in this new world of sun and splendor not everyone has my sort of luck. Well I don't know if I'd call it luck but you get the idea. It's not like my world just sent all it's good people over here and left the evil to die. Maybe that's how it would happen in some fairytale but if there's one thing I've learned it's that life isn't a fairytale. It's full of pain and suffering and you can either sit back and take it or rebel and try your best to get rid of it. Naturally I've been doing the later all my life. In this world everyone hides their pain and the demons are in their heads, not real physical evils. Everyone keeps to themselves and fights their own demons, they're afraid to open up and let people help.
So what do I do? Where's the place for a rebel from another universe who is used to the life of hardship and pain. There isn't a place here for me yet, my place is in my world, here I'm out of my league. All the people I handpicked and trained, where are they now? They're still back there and they still have to deal with life and pain and go on. A rebel doesn't just retire. I can still feel it in me. The hatred and need to hurt evil, the viciousness of Prometheus. Those emotions don't just leave or shrivel up and die. They're still here, inside of me and worse still are the visions. Aisha doesn't know, I could never tell her something like this. I can still see them and feel them though through the cursed visions of Prometheus. Sometimes they're worse even than when the eagle comes and I start to wonder again more than ever. I'm not meant for this, for this world I mean and I'm not ready for it. Yet I asked the Gods to save Aisha and they did. Only they know why they saved me too. Whatever the reason I will play the hand that fate has dealt me and I'll hope there are still people to help in this world.
Drian
Murray Grey-Curse
Journal,
It's been a hell of a week and I mean that in the worst possible way. The only reason I'm talking to a journal is thanks to the wonderful counsellers here. Naturally they think I've been through a bunch of stuff that no teen needs to ever go through and I'm suposed to write about it. To get everything out. I wonder if they ever thought I'd be writing about them instead.
Well the point is I doubt I can actually fill up a whole page or even more than a sentence about them or about what happened so I'm going to write about the week. Nice, dull and perfectly normal. Yah that's me, Mr. Normal alright. Heck in that world I ended up nearly destroying everything. Alone, friendless, uncontrollable powers...I know sounds like me know but to the extreme degree. Here I can only blow up a room or terrorize a cat. Over there the other me was blowing up full buildings and terrorizing groups of people. I have days where I'd like to do that but never for a moment would I literally want powers like that. Guess what? I don't have a choice in the matter.
Sure the professor has been helping and I've been trying but what happens if it doesn't work? That's what I keep asking myself and I kept getting the same stupid answer. The same as what happened in that dimension only here there's a little more sun. Hardly something to live and look forward too.
I've been sitting in the dark most of the week. Two reasons for that really. One it sure beats sitting with the artificially cheery light in your eyes and two it worries the counsellers and teachers. Well the Professor's aren't so bad, most of them anyway, but it's better to do what they dread and expect than to act normal and put on a smile.
I sound like a drag I know but who the heck is going to ever read this crap anyway? Sure hope the counsellers aren't on that list. I'm not going to get all serious here but something's been different since I left that world. Clay had it worst. I saw him around, alot more quiet and less of that stupid laugh of his. It's almost sad but we weren't really close anyway. Clay got the nightmare end of it, no disputing that and it's no wonder he went home. I got the 'meet your psycho other half' visit. Yup whole bushels of fun there. Geeze and I thought I was bad.
Something is different though, I'm not sure if it's thanks to having the two AU kids around or if it has to do with something like me changing. I supose I should see the Professor about it but why bother him with petty things like this? If it gets any worse I'll humiliate myself and hunt out someone. Maybe Tess. She's not half bad for a faerie girl and at least she wouldn't have it all over the school in an hour. Just when I'd gotten the crazy jokes to stop. Anyway there's entry the first. Guess it wasn't too painful but don't expect this to become a regular thing. I'm just doing it to make the "feel good councellers" think they're doing their job.
Until next week,
Murray
Tessa Macneil-Tinkerbell
Dear Diary,
I never really thought I'd lose a friend again. I certainly never thought I'd lose two in the same week. Life happens though, at least that's what my aunt always used to say to me and I guess she was right.
It's probably for the best but no matter how much I keep telling myself that it doesn't help. I've been able to tell since the second we were in the same room together that Clay wasn't the same and he's been like that ever since. Not that I don't understand his reasoning for wanting to be away from people but I think a time like this is when you need a friend more than ever before.
Gone but not forgotten though. Clay's already called me twice and Nalani promised to call within the next week. I miss Clay so much though, we'd just gotten reaquainted and everything, at least Nalani was a fairly new friend although of course I miss her too. Seems all I've got left in the way of friends are Cam and Loni at the insititute and Halle elsewhere. Speaking of Halle though I wonder if there is something in the air. After Nalani, Clay and Cassie all leaving in the same week I'm beginning to wonder, especially with Nalani actually mentionning that she wondered if something strange was going on. I don't want to say anything 'cause I know it's just stupid and is probably nothing at all but the mansion's been freezing lately. I've felt this tingling sensation and I've started permanently wearing a sweater around. Looks like someone turned the air conditioning on a little early as it's not even summer yet.
I'm just glad we're all keeping in touch. I don't think I could bear to be seperated from my friends permanently. Okay now I sound like a drama queen or something, I'm not usually like this you know but I guess I'm a little too sensitive at times. darn Faerie genes.
Well I guess that's about it. Life goes on as they say and nothing out of the ordinary has been happening so far as I can tell except for the ac problem. I haven't seen Halle in about a week and I promised I'd treat her to lunch then we could come back to the mansion and catch up if she's up to it. Naturally all this after a swim. She seems alright although she was fairly close to Nalani. Now more than ever I really need Halle here, I keep telling her she'd make a great addition to the team but I guess she just isn't ready yet.
Whoops gotta run I'm late for lunch!
Love,
Tess
Halle Parker-Selkie
Journal,
I haven't written in ages I know, I supose I just lost track of time or maybe it's just that it seems a little unnatural to me to be actually writing about my activities. Who ever heard of a selkie who writes down her daily events. There's also the fact that I have little in my life to actually record. This was one of those weeks though, you know the types. One of the weeks where things happen.
I've been talking to Tess a fair bit lately, nothing unusual I know but what she's told me about the institute is. Both of her good friends there decided it was time to move on and left within a day of eachother giving her little notice. I feel for her, I really do especially since her Faerie side makes her sensitive to people and all but I can't help suspecting it isn't a coincidence. Perhaps years of living and watching people pass by, knowing that if they knew my true nature I'd be taken away in a second has made me bitter or suspect of everything but I do doubt that.
I've been trying to help Tess out though, she's taking the loss pretty hard and I think she feels it's partly her fault. Just another reason why I shouldn't go and join up at Xavier's. I'm not meant for that sort of thing and I know I'd only end up leaving, it wouldn't work out and she's think it her fault again. I'm not a people person though and no matter what you may think magical creatures and mutants are treated differently, however slight the difference is.
I have come by the school though to help her adjust a few times. I'm not sure really how many times I can actually drop by though. I don't know if it's just me or perhaps my hatred of being in a place like that, trapped with no water, whatever the reason though it gives me chills quite literally. I feel strange coming to the school at all anymore although most of the students are welcoming.
I met Tess for lunch a few days ago and ever since we've been spending a few hours a day together. We're due to go for lunch again tonight as I could do for a dip in the lake, what with it warming up now. I know I seem uncaring to her but I don't mean to be, it's just not in my nature. A selkie was never to trust anyone in case they took her precious skin and while I have evolved from them and differ from the selkies of myth long ago I am still one of them. Their blood and mine still mingle and we fear the same things and act the same. Tessa has always been a friend in times of need though and I shall do as she has for me.
Sincerely,
Halle Parker of the Selkie line
Loni Parker-Dream
Dear Journal,
There are few people in the world who actually know what it feels like to come face to face with the person in your dreams. For the record I do mean in your dreams rather than of dreams. Back more than a week ago I had premonition dreams that had a guy in them, a guy who called himself Prometheus remember? Yah well go figure he's suddenly here, in this world.
Most people don't have something like this happen to them but here I guess anything is possible. That's what I've come to believe anyway over my time here. I guess I really shouldn't have been surprised. I knew that he was real and that it wasn't just some wacky dream with a cheese man or upside down stairs but it still startled me coming face to face with him for the first time.
He's one of those people who can be oddly annoying and yet facinating all at once and when I'm around him I'm not sure what it is I feel anymore. When I'm around him though my powers are stronger and I have complete control over everything prophetic and I feel calmer somehow and more relaxed than I have ever been. Naturally I've been spending alot of time with him and, even though it's hard to tell, I think he might feel something about me. Who knows though? He's strange like that.
The other new person Aisha is pretty cool too. She seems to be settling in well even though in this universe her mother is still alive and never had her. How strange is that? Well nothing really exciting has been happening, just the usual...of course the usual around here is a heck of alot more than at most schools. Already there's been one or two power incidents although no one was hurt. Drian and I arranged to meet for lunch today though so I'd better go. He says that our powers are linked and is quite sure that the dream thing a few weeks ago was an example. Maybe we'll be able to connect again somehow and I could be the link he's looking for so desperately back to his other world. I really hope I can help him 'cause he's given me so much already.
Bye for now,
Loni Parker
Victoria Fitzbruin-Viper
Diary,
Rarely does one have such a boring week. That's what my father used to say whenever he had meeting after meeting and as scary a thought as it is I think I'm starting to think like him. Daddy's right, something I don't get to say that often. Seriously though nothing has happened and anything that did went wrong, so typical.
First there's that Beth girl, I don't mind helping the hopeless and doing the whole charity thing..well okay maybe I do but that's beside the point. What I meant was that she is strange, I mean stranger than I thought at first. You can tell she's odd by looking at her clothes and obviously if you're a mutant you have to be somewhere along the line of weird more or less but I just don't understand her.
Everyone else has gone off on holidays or spending sprees and where am I? Stuck back helping daddy deal with his clients. Some days I feel like poisoning him or at least telling him to stop using me like this. Can't he find some other way to threaten them? Sure I get what I want, all the money in the world but it isn't like he respects me. More like fears me. Sometimes I think he stays away on purpose. After all when you're that rich there must be a way to get out of work at least one day a month, but no, not for him.
Tomorrow I'm going shopping again, big surprise I know, but I need something to wear to daddy's party tomorrow night. It's a little last minute or I would have been ready days ago but what can you do? Problem is he only invited me on business. I'm suposed to..how did he put it?..Oh yah "supervise" over a meeting with one client who tends to go back on his word. English translation? I'm suposed to poison him if he goes against father.
Like I said nothing new. So I'm going to bed already, it's been a bad enough day without staying up an extra hour to see how it can possibly get any worse.
Night,
Vicks
Jack Harmony-Blackjack
Geeze and I thought nearly chopping off my finger was a mistake. Maybe I'm not the kid person I thought I was or maybe I just don't want to admit I'm getting old. Either way it's not how it used to be here. Used to be I got looks, even from the other teachers. Now I'm just some old fogie like the rest of them. Strange really, I didn't think people's opinions mattered to me anymore but there you go.
TBC
Captain Jack Sparrow: You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?
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