Rubbing his wrists from the pain of Rogue's tight grip, Spike obediently took a seat where she had directed him to sit, he slumped into it as if he was tired. Letting a deep breath, he frowned and placed a hand over his chest.

Spike:"...Ow.."

He grumbled as if only just realizing he's been hurt.

Spike:"When Angelus comes, Furball and he are going to enjoy playing another round of kick the Spike.."

His groaned to himself, his mind slowly settling, his glimps of insanity slowly seeming to fade away.

Spike:"...He's was right about a few things though, you can't trust me, not after everything I've done, disappoint everyone I do..always telling me I'm beneath them.."

He frowned.

Spike:"But he's wrong about me killing you lot, I won't! I.."

He clentched his teeth, forcing himself to finish the sentance even though he didn't want to.

Spike:"..I can't."

He looked away, a shame so great, one he had been beaten and put down constintly for having, was being revealed to a group of people he didn't know, didn't trust, and obviously cared nothing about him.

Spike:"I have....a device....in my head.."

He began slowly, looking up at Rogue in hopes of convincing her what he said was true.

Spike:"...if I try and harm a human...it hurts me....so what he said about me killing you is bollocks! I can't!"

At Bobby's request for them to drop the subject Spike could almost feel the tension in his body release, the very subject of that creature was enough to paralyse him in fear.

Rogue:"Yep, fortunately this one seems to be clean"

Flipping his hands over so he could see his palms, Spike examined them....he wasn't clean...was he? He was filthy...covered in blood, always covered in blood...can't ever wash it away..

Rogue:"Anyway, I think it's pretty important what we've got with Judas. I mean, what if he's like some demon sort of being wanting to kill us all just for fun?"

Looking past his hands his eyes fell upon Rogue's slim form, the fact she didn't appear serious about what she said made Spike more nervous.

Mother:"Ever since the day you first slithered from me like a parasite..."

He frowned, staring at Rogue, for a moment thinking those words had come from her.

Spike:"..What?"

He asked eyeing the southern belle unhappily, insulted by that comment deeply.

Mother:"All anyone's tried to do is get rid of you..."

Realizing it wasn't Rogue who had spoken the vampire looked away and placed a hand over the side of his ear, trying his best to convince himself he didn't care what he heard.

Mother:"First he'll kill aaaall of them..."

She whispered almost lovingly into his ear, Spike cringed, tilting his body to the side of the seat in a hopeless attempt to get away from her.

Mother:"...And then he'll slowly devour you...slowly, he wont be merciful like Angelus, he'll make sure you truly suffer, every second of every minute, for every hour of every day, for as long as all eternity.."

Spike:"If that happens, then I've deserved it haven't I?"

He glared back, his voice shaky although he continued to try and act tough.

Mother:"Of course you deserve it you pathetic fool!"

She yelled at him, causing her son to flinch and sink into his seat, she almost laughed at him as he pulled his feet onto the chair, his knees pressed up against his chest, shaking her head, disgusted with how he was acting. She turned to leave.

Spike:"Wait, where are you going?"

She turned around, a warm smile placed upon her face as she looked over at her son. Her eyes made him scared, he knew she was going...again. He crossed his arms over his chest, his fists clenched tightly and they pressed against his shoulders

Mother:"To take my leave of you, of course."

With a laugh, she turned around and disappeared, Spike stared at the wall, as if waiting for her to return, but she didn't..

Spike:"...Mom?"

He whispered desperately wanting her to return him.

Spike:"..Mom.."

He called even softer not wanting her to be angry with him, he kept his knees pulled his chest, realizing she didn't want to return to him, he placed his head on his knees, hiding his face.

Spike:".....I said I was sorry.."

He could hear the movement of the others in the room, their breathing, the beating of their hearts...he'd forgotten about them..

Spike:"...They're ment to always forgive you...."

His voice was still a whisper, and as he continued talking it grew even softer, though he spoke as if he was in tears, his eyes refused to allow a single tear to form..

Spike:"...But she wont ever forgive me."